Lost Cause
by IvaChism
Summary: Jasper is a relic of a lost time. His mind is shattered beyond repair and he is labeled feral, dangerous. A lost cause. Dismissed by all... except one. JxB
1. Chapter 1

It was a sound that woke him. No, not a sound. A scent? No… he can't quite tell… he can't quite…

It's all over the place. What is? His mind? No, he doesn't know. Or does he? Yes, he does- he's confused.

How long has it been? Minutes? Hours? How does one untouched by time feel its silent passage? Perhaps he should start by opening his eyes…?

Yes. He'll do that.

Darkness. Nothing but darkness. He's blind. Who took his eyes?

He takes a quick breath, a knee-jerk reaction. Mildew… dead things and growing things alike, intertwined as closely as lovers.

His throat feels full… no, his entire skull is full. Of what?

Dirt.

He coughs and chokes, panics when no air fills his lungs, only the cloying earth. He bucks, writhing and rolling and shuddering. He's drowning, drowning, drowning…and suddenly… suddenly he emerges.

As he bursts from the ground, tearing away the hardened earth with fingers curled into claws, he hacks and coughs and doubles over, clearing his body of the thick sludge that had lain stagnant in his body for… minutes, hours, months, he doesn't know. He doesn't know he doesn't know he doesn't…

He breathes his first real breath of air, gasping like a drowned man. He tears at his eyes, dragging away dirt and moss and vines and then there is light, blinding and terrible and as venomous as fire.

It's magnificent.

He's frozen, stiffly staring up into the blue sky. A vulture wheels miles above him. Its golden eyes dismiss him as quickly as they look at him.

Slowly, so so slowly, he crawls from his grave. The wood had rotted away long ago, mere sawdust coating his body.

What happened… no. He can't think right now. He doesn't want to. No.

He takes another breath to calm his raging mind and stills, rigidly silent.

And then he's off, dashing through the forest. Trees fall before him, clipped by his shoulders, and the ground cracks beneath his feet. And then he's falling upon a bobcat, its life ended before it had even registered the danger.

Sweet, sweet liquid flows down his throat, washing away the dirt of his grave. It's the most magnificent feeling he's ever experienced, this amazing meal. He holds the animal closer, buries his face into its fur as he continues to suckle from its torn throat.

So magnificent. Not as good as… no. Don't think about that. No.

When the red stops pouring, he reverently sets the animal aside, though he continues to stroke its fur. So soft… has he ever felt anything quite as fine?

Time passes. He only knows it does because the bobcat's corpse slowly withers away in his hands, carried away by ants and worms and cautious buzzards. When he holds not but bones, he finally stands.

He looks down at himself and feels a mild form of surprise. His uniform lays in tatters off of him, moth-eaten and dirty… god, if the Colonel saw him like this, he'd tan his hide- that stern old man had bucked and gagged men for less.

He runs his hands through his matted hair.

He had to get back to his troops before they labeled him a deserter.

Walking in a circle reveals nothing. He doesn't recognize… anything. These woods are featureless, never-ending.

Is this hell? Did he take a slug to the head and he isn't even aware of it?

But then there's a silhouette in the distance, approaching like a fog.

It's an… angel? No. He-… he doesn't feel right.

His throat feels like it's tearing apart. Has he swallowed a hive of bees? What is happening to him?

The figure hesitates. Her short-cropped hair sways against her chin in the softly-stirring breeze.

She says something… but he doesn't- he doesn't understand?

But…

He feels better when he rips her head from her body. Flinging it away as far as he can, he stumbles away from the creature's twitching body.

He needs to get back to his troops. His troops… he needs to go home. Back to his ma and pa and his baby sister. He needs…

He needs to find his home.

* * *

If it comes off as neurotic and running in circles and hard to follow- good! Our boy's mind isn't quite… right. Let me know if I should continue.

Some history notes:

A Major is third in command. Colonel is first, followed by Lieutenant Colonel.

Bucking and Gagging was a punishment employed during the civil war. The wrong-doer had his hands tied at his shins and his feet tied together at the ankles. A rod or stick was then shoved over the arms and under the knees and he was gagged with a cloth where he would sit utterly immobile for hours. Even minor offenses would warrant this punishment. Described by one soldier as 'jaw-clenching, molar-grinding agony'…

-Iva :)


	2. Chapter 2

There are eleven of them, closing in ever nearer, surrounding him.

He'd run for miles upon miles but no matter how fast, they were always just on his peripheral. Not so close as to warrant an attack, but certainly close enough to make their presence known.

He'd turned on his heel at one point, zeroing in on the nearest presence. The stranger had balked, turned and fled in a northerly direction, always out of sight, until finally he'd lost interest. But then the stranger had doubled around, snagged his attention once more, and the chase resumed.

They were luring him, he realized, baiting him to a certain location know only to them. The moment he'd realized this, he'd doubled back. But they'd bundled together, as if able to read his mind, and forced him to continue onto their realized trajectory.

He'd been strong once, he remembers this. Stronger and more ferocious than any other. But this hunger tearing into his throat, digging at his chest, renders him weak. Helpless. Perhaps once upon a time, he'd have eradicated these eleven strangers with ease. But now, on the brink of exhaustion and starvation, all he can do is play right into their little trap.

From arid deserts to grassy plains, they ran him continuously. If he paused even for a moment to hunt, they'd dive forward and force him away from his prey with their approaching presence alone. He knew better than to let them get too close. Just near enough that he could sense them. He'd not even seen the faces of his pursuers yet. Like faceless monsters known only in nightmares, they are unknown to him.

And now, he runs through a forest ripe with life. Herds of deer run rampant, trees intertwined by thick vines and shrubbery that shiver in the cool breeze. Cicadas and grasshoppers rattle throughout the branches, chirruping loudly for all to hear and encompassing it all are thick grey clouds that permit only the barest of sunlight to filter through.

And then he hears it. A stern command issued strictly, hastily. "Now, Emmett!"

A huge man streaks forward, massive arms outstretched.

They collide in a shattering, thunderous sound, kicking up clouds of dirt.

This stranger, this Emmett, is so strong- too strong for him- which becomes apparent when he wraps his massive arms around him and throws him to the ground, pinning him with his own body.

He writhes below Emmett, snarling and snapping his teeth together. The touch of his skin against another's _burns._ It fills him with such agony, such pain- like acid bubbling within his bones. Too close too close _too close!_

Suddenly, the bear of a man rips himself away, gasping raggedly.

Surging to his feet, his teeth are just inches from tearing into the throat of the incapacitated stranger when yet another force bowls into his side. He's thrown through the air, crashing into multiple trees in a cacophonous booming of sound made all the more sinister by the ragged growls and snarls.

He picks himself up from the rubble, aching like he's never ached before. He's so tired… so hungry. Ravenous.

Through the haze of clearing dirt and falling pine needles, a woman appears, her straight blonde hair whispering in the breeze.

He grits his teeth and stands, willing away the nauseous dizziness that plagues him. Righting himself after stumbling, he steadies his mind and body and flies forward.

Oddly, the woman doesn't move. She stares defiantly, jaw tense. Prepared.

He skids to a stop feet from her, sensing her treachery. Too late though, she's seen his hesitation and is coming to meet him. Before he can feint backward, her hands are wrapped around his neck.

Absolute agony assaults him, a terrible course of electricity burning through his veins. It fries his skin, his mind, his entire body.

It takes all of his will, all of his strength, to tear her claws from him. He resorts to sinking his teeth deep into her throat, ripping and ravaging until her awful, electric touch disappears.

He roars, his mind a rampaging mess. These creatures seek his demise. It is only fair that he return the favor.

As her sweet, beautiful screams fill his ears, he smiles giddily. _This._ This fear permeating from her as she looks up at him from the ground, as she backpedals… he can _taste_ her fright on his tongue… it fills him with such a delicious feeling. A familiar feeling.

And then arms are wrapping around him. His torso, his legs, around his neck, even his eyes. The ten other strangers have rallied together and now render him utterly immobile.

He can't move, he can't breathe- he can hardly think. They're _touching_ him- _him!_ Too much too much too much…

He screams. Long and loud and for all he is worth, he screams. He bucks and writhes and claws and tears but they won't _stop._

All he wants is to be left alone. Leave him alone, alone!

"Get off of me!" he rages. "Get off!"

He almost begs. Almost. Anything to rid him of this feeling. But he remembers himself at the last moment- he is a major, a soldier of the Confederate army. He does not beg.

"I need you to calm down, Jasper," a man soothes even as he tightens his hold on him.

Jasper? Jasper… Jasper, he does not know who that is- _what_ that is.

"Calm…" the man says again. "I know you're scared. You have been alone for a very long time. But nobody is going to hurt you."

Death, blood, corpses, get off! He rails against them again, resorting to raging and shouting his pain to the sky, howling his fury and terror.

The arms holding him shiver and tremble but they hold true, even tighten.

"His mind is all over the place," a male hisses. "He's raving!"

A brief surge of strength and he manages to free one of his arms. Grabbing one of his assailant's hands, he drags it to his mouth and bites, tearing his teeth into flesh and grinding his teeth together.

A ragged hiss follows and then he's shoved into the cool ground. He snarls, inhaling mouthfuls of dirt with each gasping breath and he remembers his grave. He remembers and it _terrifies_ him.

"He's feral- no better than a beast. No reasoning with him. We need to kill him before he hurts someone else!"

"No! His life has more meaning than you know- than any of us know!"

"Alice, I understand you have visions, but _this_ is not what we were prepared for. Not what you told us would happen. His mind is too far gone, I can see it. He thinks _nothing,_ he only feels. And his memories..."

"Just keep him still. Just a few more minutes. Jasper, I know you don't understand me, I know, but you need to calm yourself."

He wildly rails against them, snapping his jaws together before releasing another roar.

The arms tighten, the bodies press closer and closer and closer and he's burning! He's burning, acid running through his veins- worse than the woman with electricity running from her hands. He screams and roars and cries out and trembles but nothing saves him from this agony, this hell on earth.

He just wants to go home… he just wants to be alone… please, please, leave him alone… get away get away get away.

Finally, a low sob escapes his throat unbidden and slowly, as slowly as the sun sets, he goes limp. His head lowers to his chest and his vision darkens as he falls into the closest thing to sleep a creature such as he can achieve.

* * *

We'll be swapping heads next chapter so we can have a better understanding beyond Jasper's fairly limited perspective. Even so, I hope there is still clarity. Thank you so much for all of the support from the first chapter, I'm glad others will be joining me on this journey :) And please review, I'd love to hear your thoughts!


	3. Chapter 3

Bella exits her bathroom in a warm, swirling mist, her towel wrapped neatly around her hair as she fiddles with the strings of her pajama bottoms. School today had been hard. Jessica was her usual catty self and Mike was making puppy eyes at her from across the cafeteria, which of course made Jessica act even more... Jessica.

She hums tunelessly as she hops onto her bed, grabbing a book as she does so and settling deep into her covers. Her aching muscles begin to loosen and relax as she tucks her blankets around her. Sighing softly, she closes her eyes and appreciates the liquid comfort of a steamy shower and soft bedsheets. This is nice…

"Bella."

She lets out a choked scream and simultaneously throws the book she'd been holding and falling from the bed with a soft thump.

Edward retrieves the fallen book from the floor, thinly veiled amusement glittering in his eyes as he watches her prostrate form.

"Edward, you've got to stop doing that," she mutters into the carpet exhaustedly, pausing to yawn widely. That was the second time this week alone.

"I called for you many times," he says as he takes a seat on her bed, looking down at her as she slowly picks herself up. "You must have dozed off."

Bella sighs frustratedly, taking the time to look over her shoulder and give him a sour look. She's tired, dammit, and she doesn't have the patience to deal with this right now.

"What's so important that you need to scare me half to death, then?"

"Can't I come see you for the sake of it?"

"Edward."

He sighs and gestures for her to join him on the bed. His head is lowered, his eyes distant. He seems… off, somehow.

With a fair amount of hesitance, she complies, tucking her feet below her and nervously chewing on her lip. As an afterthought, she grabs her pillow and hugs it to her chest.

"What's wrong?" she asks softly, all previous vestiges of sleep evaporated in the face of Edward's odd graveness. Come to think of it, he'd acted peculiarly yesterday as well. Ever since he'd gotten back from that hunting trip the day previous, he'd been… distant. Distracted. Has she done something wrong? Is he mad at her? He'd only stayed a few minutes to let her know he was back and then he was off again, vanishing into the night.

"I simply came to tell you that… you are not to come to the house under any circumstance. Do you understand?"

"Edward, I-"

"Do you understand?"

There is no reasoning with her boyfriend when he is like this, domineering and forceful, so she nods slowly albeit dubiously. "And Emmett and Alice? How will I see them if-"

"You'll see them at school. That should be enough."

Her anger surges again but she tamps it down. He's obviously worried about something.

"What is this about?"

"It's…" he rubs his arm and shrugs feebly, "hard to explain."

Well, that sure helped.

His eyes grow distant as he continues to rub his arm.

"I'm sure I can understand," she declares. "We have all night."

"Bella," he sighs exasperatedly.

"Edward," she says in the same voice.

He shakes his head and continues to rub his arm.

"What is wrong?" she demands, reaching out and grabbing his arm. He tenses below her touch, readying to jerk away, but she tightens her hold, glaring sternly.

When he finally stills, she peels back the long sleeve of his shirt and gasps, slapping a hand to her mouth.

"What happened?" she whispers, taking in the sight of mangled flesh knitted roughly together in the vague shape of teeth. "Who bit you?"

"It's nothing-"

"Edward," she growls, releasing him when he pulls away. "I know you think you can protect me from anything. I know you'd do anything for me. But that goes both ways, you know? To know that someone hurt you and not even know who did it…" she shakes her head. "This is a relationship. Things are a two-way street around here."

He's quiet for a moment, clearly debating the best course of action. Finally, he drops his head.

"It was a feral. Got his hands on me before I could stop him."

"A feral?"

"A vampire who's lost their humanity. We were tracking him because Alice," here he shakes his head and makes a disgusted face, "Alice had another one of her _visions_." He says it with such distaste that even Bella feels discomfort.

"During the hunting trip," she realizes, nodding understandingly and waiting patiently for him to continue.

"She said he was destined for something great."

"And that is?"

He bares his teeth and shrugs viciously. "That's the thing- she won't tell me, won't tell any of us. I can't even find it in her mind. She just keeps repeating that he's here for something greater."

"And he's at the house," she surmises. "Is he dangerous?"

He nods, wraps his arm around her and drags her close to his side like a child reaching for a teddy bear. "Some of the things I've seen in his mind…" he shivers against her. "It's utterly foul. He'd drain you as soon as look at you."

She frowns. Why would Alice keep such a dangerous vampire around? Her visions have been wrong before. Why would she put such faith in the feral?

"What's his opinion on the matter?"

"He doesn't have one. Feral, remember? No lucid thoughts beyond basic stuff; hunger, boredom. Things like that. He's no better than a person in a coma."

"How awful," she whispers. "That poor man, trapped in his own mind. What could have happened to him?" Do vampires get PTSD? Shellshock? It would make sense- eternal creatures exposed to all manner of evil, of course they'd not come away unscathed.

"Don't feel sorry for him, Bella. He's killed many… hundreds, even. If he has a soul, it is as dark as night."

She nods for appearance's sake, but she can't help herself in pitying him. That is a fate worse than death, to live without living. And for eternity, for that matter.

"I'll come tomorrow night," he murmurs, "I've got to get back now. The Denali coven is here, helping us to keep him subdued. They'll need my help."

"Be safe," she mutters, smiling tiredly as he bends to kiss her cheek.

Before he departs, he turns and points at her. "No coming to the house. Understood?"

Her earlier annoyance rises and before she gets angry and starts an argument, she turns her back to him as she settles into her bed.

A soft chuckle sounds and then he's gone, a gentle 'Goodnight, Bella,' echoing in the sudden silence.

* * *

Updates won't be this often forever, but for now this damned story won't leave me alone. ;) Next chapter is big... a meeting, perhaps?


	4. Chapter 4

He stretches slowly, opening and closing his fingers and flexing his neck. When the tension leaves, he settles back into his chains, allowing them to take his weight.

It's dark here. So dark that not even his superior eyesight can pierce the room. A room, yes, he knows he's in a room. But where? He hardly has an idea, only that it smells of mildew and rot.

He tenses again, moving his legs so they stretch out in front of him. He's oddly bound, thick iron linked together and wrapped around his wrists and ankles. He'd tried, he'd tried _so hard._ But they proved too strong for him to escape. He'd snarled and howled and shouted, yet no one came for him.

So he's quiet, as silent as the room he's in, breathing shallowly through his nose.

How long has it been? Has it been as long as he was underneath? No, he doubts it. But how long? He doesn't know. He doesn't know…this is truly hell.

A door opens suddenly, the flick of a lock hurting his sensitive hearing. Light floods into the opening, burning his eyes.

He begins to panic when footsteps approach him, closer and closer. He snarls weakly, then adds more power to it as the stranger continues forward, choosing to not heed his warnings.

He jerks against his bindings, baring his teeth wildly.

When the stranger grabs his arm, he lunges. They jump backward and make a chastising noise, and then their hands are back on him. No matter how loud he becomes or how ferociously he snaps at them, they continue to fidget with the chains around him.

And then… and then their iron weight suddenly drops from him, clattering to the ground in a sinister pile.

As he leans down to inspect the links, he suddenly realizes the stranger is no longer here. Where did they go? How could they leave without his noticing?

He swallows his growls and snarls, taming them to a muted rumbling that vibrates his chest.

Wearily, he slinks towards the door still hanging open and peeks outside hesitantly. Nothing but an ordinary house made of immense windows and fine furniture. It makes him nervous to be around such finery. What if he were to break something?

As slowly and gently as he can, he creeps through the house, swallowing against the dryness in his throat and itching at the odd clothes they'd forced onto him.

His captors had neglected him any food- to keep him weak, he's sure. And now he feels that weakness in the very way his steps tax him so and in the faint dimming of his vision. It's unsettling.

Following his nose, he creeps to the door. Beyond, he can smell the forest. Pine trees and sap and growing things, and he takes a moment to appreciate the medley filling his lungs.

With the care he would afford a newborn babe, he gently presses down on the hinge until the door slowly creaks open. Releasing a breath he'd unknowingly been holding, he creeps outside. For a moment, he simply enjoys the soft breeze curling through his untamed hair. The leaves shuddering in the breeze fill his ears, as does the distant sound of deer and birds and foraging bears.

He'd spent so long in the darkness… far too long.

But then the breeze brings with it something foreign and yet familiar. Something at once soothing and exciting, intoxicating and startlingly refreshing. He takes deep gulps of the scent, closing his eyes to appreciate this strange new smell. It makes him shiver and tremble. He's never come across anything quite like it and yet he's known it his entire life… it was… it is…

Home.

* * *

Bella pattered across the kitchen, rising to her tiptoes to grab a plate from the cabinet.

A soothing song played from her phone and she gently sang along, not bothering to cringe at her atrocious voice when nobody is around to hear it.

The smell of something burning makes her turn around and let out a rushed curse as she sees the eggs in the pan begin to let off a black smoke.

"Crap, crap, crap," she mutters as she hurries them to the sink and, after a moment of deliberation, douses the mess in water. She sets it into the sink and runs a hand through her hair. So much for dinner…

The song is interrupted by the ringing of her phone.

"Hey, Angela," she rushes to greet her friend, swiping her hair out of her eyes.

"Bella? Are you ok?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just finished burning my dinner is all." She turns back to eye the still sizzling pan in the sink. She doesn't know what is up with her lately, but her mind is everywhere but present.

"Ah, hope I didn't cause that. I can call back?"

"No, no. I just let my mind wander. Eggs were never my forte."

"Bella," she sounds disappointed. "Breakfast for dinner again? What would Charlie think?"

"He doesn't get to _think_ anything unless he wants to get in here and do the cooking himself."

Angela chuckles. "I take it you're on your own tonight?"

Bella tucks the phone between her shoulder and ear and sets to cleaning her mess, wetting a rag and wiping down the spattered counters "Yeah, Charlie's working overtime again. Probably won't be back 'till morning."

"Well, if you want, we can have a sleepover? I just popped some popcorn, got a movie loaded up."

"That… that actually sounds really nice." A chance to get out of her recently stifling house sounded like it would do her wonders. Maybe even restore her cooking skills.

"Awesome! Well, come on over. I'll try not to eat all the popcorn."

Bella shares in the laugh and hangs up, smiling absentmindedly as she gets to work running a soapy sponge across the pan.

Humming, she dances across the kitchen to replace the pots and pans. And as she whirls back around in an awful parody of what she'd been taught in ballet class, she stumbles right into a warm, hard chest.

At first, she thinks its Edward. But then… he isn't warm. Charlie? No, her father wouldn't sneak up on her like this.

Horror-movie slow, she turns and looks over her shoulder.

The scream catches in her throat, coming out more as an awful groan as she stumbles away from the stranger in her kitchen. He's unmoving, unnaturally so, staring down at her from a significant height difference. What. The. Hell.

He's not moving, is he even breathing? How long has she been thinking? Minutes? Sure feels like it.

And then logic picks up its megaphone and screams right into her mind, ' _RUN!'_ And who is she to disobey her logic?

Sparing a moment to feint left and right, appearing quite stupid if she had her mind about her, she sprints towards the door.

But he's there, right in front of her. Ok. A vampire then. Of course it is. That tiny voice of logic goes limp, shakes its head and declares her a dead girl walking. Thanks, logic.

She retreats, shaking her head, then wheels on her heel and heads towards the stairs. Again, he's right in front of her.

Oh, god. She's dead, isn't she? After just learning about the supernatural world and the distant possibility that she might one day join it with Edward at her side, she gets taken out by a strange vampire. Wonderful. Just great.

Ok, panicking won't help. Deep breaths, Bella. Deep breaths. She inhales like her life depends on it then releases it in a great whoosh. There we go, nice and even.

But the moment the man begins to creep towards her, no, more like stalk towards her, those calm breaths turn into hyperventilating pants.

"Ok, ok, hi? Hello?"

He pauses mid-step, wavering.

She sucks down more air and swallows loudly. "Um… m-my name is Bella. A-and you're on Cullen territory, ok? If you hurt me, they'll kill you."

He's silent, merely staring at her, expression unyielding.

"There's a lot of them," she declares as she slowly backs up into the kitchen. "Strong, too. So, if you could just…" without her permission, her voice grows small, "leave." Stumbling as she backs into a chair, she numbly falls into it, distantly realizing that she's shaking.

The stranger seems to waver, uncertain and curious, although how she knows this is beyond her- after all, his expression reveals nothing.

In the silence that follows, she manages to bring her breathing back to a relatively normal rhythm.

And then, as slowly as the sun itself when it sets, he moves into the kitchen, making it feel smaller than it ever has before. He comes closer and closer and she's positive he's about to take a bite out of her when he passes her in favor of the chair beyond. It squeals as it's dragged across the wooden floor and then he's taking a seat, settling himself gently into it. Almost as an after-thought, he crosses his arms across his chest, then thinks better of it and settles them stiffly against the table.

O…k….

She holds his gaze in disbelief before remembering all she'd learned from Edward. Vampires are more animalistic than a human, right? Would this one take it as a challenge if she looked into his eyes? She slowly focuses on the ground right in front of her, only occasionally darting glances up at him.

A stalemate, then…

As she worries her lip and holds herself as rigidly as possible, she takes the time to inspect him.

Long, dirty blonde hair hang in gentle waves, resting against his chin in a careless cascade. And his eyes- they're blacker than black, a near endless void. Like the rest of the Cullen coven, he's alabaster pale, as if carved from granite, and unnaturally handsome. Any girl could fall for him, but she can see it in his eyes, that pacing predator just waiting to strike. A thought occurs to her. This… this is the feral, isn't it? The one Edward mentioned? Oh god…

She shivers and raises her legs onto the chair, wrapping her arms around her knees and hugging them to her chest.

But…

He's not doing anything. Just staring. Why isn't he ripping her limb from limb? 'Draining her', as Edward had mentioned? He certainly doesn't act like she'd expected a feral would. No frothing at the mouth, no incoherent mutterings. No, he's simply sitting across from her.

The feral suddenly moves, repositioning his legs in front of him and wrapping his arms around them. A near perfect mirror of her own position.

Eternal minutes pass and she can't help but feel like a fawn in the claws of a lion. She'd watched videos online, where the predator seemed to become confused, somehow taking the fawn as its own. But then, inexorably, the fawn always died, either at the lion's careless hands or by stress and malnourishment.

Is that what this is? A confused predator?

The feral moves again, resting his chin against his upraised knees as if he were exhausted.

Can vampires even get tired?

As she breathes slowly, purposefully, she realizes there's an echo. He's mimicking her, evidenced by the gentle rise and fall of his chest. On a whim, she holds her breath. The soft puffs of air cease as quickly as her own.

Unable to help it, a brief spark of strained amusement makes her giggle.

He tilts his head subtly, hair falling into his eyes, but doesn't move beyond that.

"I'm sorry," she says, waving her hand dismissively. "This is just…" Insane? Unbelievable? Surreal? She can't quite place the thought.

Why is she so calm? Perhaps because she's been staring into the maws of death for a seeming eternity and they've yet to close on her. She spares a quick glance around the kitchen, spotting her phone just feet from her. She'll have to lean across the table to get it but she'll simply have to do it. She can't simply sit here and wait for him to get hungry… or hungrier.

She slowly unwinds her arms and, as if reaching for a wild animal, leans forward. Pausing, she glances towards him. He's unmoving, though his black eyes seem more lucid, present. Focusing back on the phone, she slowly curls her fingers around it and, once it is safely in her grip, drags it to her chest.

Trembling, she looks between him and the screen hastily as she enters Edward's number. Her thumb is just about to press down on the dial button when she inexplicably pauses.

He's… staring intensely at the microwave and its blinking, neon green timer. If she hadn't been watching him so closely, she would have missed the way his arms tightened further around himself. As if waking from a stupor, he looks around the kitchen in a growing franticness, from the fridge to the sink and the air-conditioning vent sputtering from the ceiling.

It's a surprise from the previous, inanimate creature to this suddenly sporadic, twitching man. With a start, she realizes his eyes have lightened considerably, though are still a dark black.

He suddenly leaps to his feet, the chair smashing across the room, and then he's leaving the kitchen in quick strides like a man on a mission.

Bella is dumb-struck, left at the table with her mouth agape. A crash sounds from the living room and she spares one last glance at the number on her phone before closing it and shoving it into her pocket.

Slowly, she creeps to the kitchen doorway and hesitantly looks into the living room.

Like the kitchen, he's looking every which way, from the t.v. to the sofa to the lamp with the most confounded expression she's ever seen a vampire make.

She whispers, for anything above a hush sounds wrong in the quiet house. "Are you… alright?"

 _Yes, Bella, ask the feral vampire if he's ok. Good idea. Remind me again, why we're not calling Edward and every other damn vampire we know right now?_

He'd whipped around at her words as if he'd forgotten she was there.

His head begins to shake as if unbelieving of his circumstances. And then his hands are rising and gripping his tangled locks and pulling on them fiercely. As he hunches into himself, a sound escapes him, one almost too quiet for her ears. But she had heard it. A stifled, barely there sob.

It pulls on her heart strings like nothing else ever has. If she didn't know his true nature, if he weren't a stranger, she'd have already enveloped him into a hug. But he's yet to make a threatening move…

He seems only… scared. Confused. Lost.

"Hey," she whispers, taking a step forward and pausing. "I can see you're afraid- it's ok. It's alright… Hey."

He continues to tremble, his entire body shivering and rattling.

It breaks her heart to see. She'd only ever seen one thing similar, and it was those damned ASPCA commercials with the trembling dogs and cats and their sad, sad eyes. The very same commercials that had her bawling like a baby whenever they aired. At once it feels both wrong and completely right to compare him to an abused animal.

Swallowing her fear and, admittedly her logic, she approaches ever closer to the hungry, scared apex predator.

"I, um… when I was younger and I became afraid, I used to hug my mom or dad. And they'd let me, for as long as I wanted. And it always made me feel better." She chews on her lip. "I could…" she feels foolish even thinking it, so she swallows down the words before they leave her mouth. _Of course the vampire doesn't want a hug from you, stupid! And why would you want to hug him in the first place? Darwinism is certainly in play, huh Bella?_

Lost in her thoughts, she doesn't have time to notice as he crosses the distance between them in a flash.

He hesitates just inches from her. His eyes flit between her own uncertainly, his distrust plain to see.

She gasps softly, flinching with a soft, 'oh' at the utter speed he'd displayed.

He's just… standing there. Waiting for her?

"Is this ok?" she asks, slowly reaching out her hand between them. His gaze drops to her hand, zeroing in on it with such intensity that she swallows loudly.

It feels like she's reaching into the mouth of a crocodile.

No. No, she's helping a scared and confused man in the only way she knows how.

The moment her fingers touch his chest, they both inhale softly. As if that one touch opened the floodgates, he's suddenly moving even closer. His chest presses into her own and his chin drops onto her shoulder. Reorienting herself, she raises her arms and ever so slowly lets the come to rest across his broad shoulders.

As she allows his shaking to envelop them both, she realizes he's _warm._ Comfortable. She shushes him again and slowly begins running her hands up and down his back.

Through the thin, long sleeved Henley he wears, she can feel his ribs, one by one. What happened to him? Was he being fed? Could vampires starve to death?

Bella freezes when his nose suddenly finds the dip of her shoulder, burying into the crevasse and staying there stubbornly. His chest expands against her own as he inhales her scent and she unconsciously tenses, preparing for the bite.

But it never comes. What comes instead are his arms, raising to wrap around her, pulling her even closer- something she hadn't thought possible.

Unwarranted, a blush rises to her cheeks as his scent fills her nose- a pleasing yet gentle combination of fresh rainwater and mesquite. This is… intimate. Far more intimate than she and Edward had ever reached. She'd only ever held hands with him, and the spare few kisses against her cheeks. But this… felt a thousand times different. Deeper, almost. Far closer.

One of her hands raises and, after a brief hesitation, wraps around the back of his neck and kneads softly.

The reaction is immediate. He melts against her like a cat, seemingly forgetting his considerable weight as he pushes her to her knees, collapsing right along with her.

He nuzzles her again, holds her tighter, his knees outlining her own.

"There," she whispers. "Everything's alright…"

He's so warm, yet still he shivers.

She reaches out to the couch and grabs the blanket thrown around the back of it.

Dragging it towards them, she settles it around them both like a fussing mother, tucking it into every crease and worrying over it until it's just right.

She takes the stranger into her arms once more, contemplating that she doesn't even know his name.

What an odd turn her night has taken…

Damn, she forgot about Angela. Taking out her phone, she quickly texts a brief explanation then returns it to her pocket.

As she resumes kneading the back of his neck, she chances a conversation. As softly as she can, she asks, "What is your name?"

He doesn't move against her, doesn't give any sign at all that he heard her.

"Do you know where you are? ... Do you know _who_ you are?"

Nothing.

Although it is clear he isn't as feral as the meaning of the word would suggest, he certainly isn't normal. No, there's something not quite right about him. This ping-ponging between emotions, the clear confusion… it all spoke to a mental chaos that made her shudder to consider. What would it take to break a vampire's mind? Something horrendous, surely.

She hugs him tighter at the thought. Bella had always considered herself a rather loner, non-touchy-feely type individual. But this man is quickly proving her wrong. She wants nothing more than to wrap him up in a hundred blankets and to fix his fractured mind with the snap of a finger.

But it doesn't work like that, she knows. Nothing could ever be so easy.

No, she can't fix him. But she can certainly hold onto him, and she'll do so for as long as he'll allow, and hopefully, hopefully, he'll feel better for it.

So strange that she's so devoted to this man, a stranger who wandered into her house. But there's something that lures her closer to him, makes her want to protect him, to be close. And for now, she won't fight it.

Bella tightens her hold on him. "I'm right here."

* * *

AN:

Y'all... I don't even know. I guess I was feeling sappy tonight. But I love me the mental cases (who isn't one?) and felt like our boy needed some lovin' after these past few chapters, even if it is from a stranger.

How will Edward react to the missing feral snuggling up to his girl? Who let Jasper out of his chains? Why is Bella so drawn to him (besides the fact that he's fucking gorgeous?)?

Thanks for all the reviews, favs, and follows- keeps me going!


	5. Chapter 5

Warmth. Comfort. Peace.

Home.

This is it. Home- he knows it.

From her soft cooing to her intoxicating scent, this gentle creature holding him is… what is she? His? His what? He doesn't know.

All he knows, what little of it that there is, is that she brings his wild, untamable mind to rest- and that must make her important, whatever she is.

When she falls limp against him, he holds her even closer. Pressing his cheek against her own, he wonders if it would be alright if he just… would she mind? Of course she would… wouldn't she? Does she? Does she even know? Of the blood… death… screams and crying and pleas for mercy and the blood the blood the blood-

Would she mind?

Ever so gently, he maneuvers her so that she rests fully against him. With one arm cradling her against him, he slowly raises his hand before hesitating. She'd be angry, just like the other one. But what if she isn't?

She certainly doesn't smell like the other. Not of blood, but of a flower. Not of rage and terror-inducing, mind-numbing fury, but of fresh rainwater and a gentle breeze.

She wouldn't mind.

Closing his eyes and bracing himself for her rage, for the pain, he ever so slowly threads his fingers through her hair.

She doesn't snarl. She doesn't bite or growl or tear her claws into him…

Instead, this gentle girl sighs softly and burrows even closer to him, grabbing loose fistfuls of his shirt.

What a marvel, this girl.

He is delightfully surprised to discover that her hair is like silk. Soft and wavy and cascading through his fingers as he, for all intents and purposes, pets her.

He imagines he could continue on for the rest of the night, for as long as she'd allow him. But the man standing at the doorway seems displeased and, for the moment, he halts his ministrations.

The man snarls and growls… just like _she_ used to. This stranger radiates with fury, trembles with it.

Just like her just like her just like her would he hurt her?

Slowly, he turns so his body is between this girl and the male.

Unbidden, his lips peel back from his teeth and he finds a primal, animalistic sounds ripping from his throat.

* * *

The soft pressure that had been cradling her before begins to increase. It tightens and tightens to the point that she can't breathe.

Waking with a gasp, Bella struggles instinctively against the force crushing the breath from her lungs.

"Bella, stop!"

Edward? He sounds so frightened, so worried.

Terror floods her veins, for what could make a vampire scared? So she stops struggling, even though she can't breathe, and forces herself to take in the scene around her.

It's the stranger from before. Had she fallen asleep against him? He has her face pressed against his neck, hiding her from Edward's sight. He looks… utterly ferocious, animalistic, with his face creased in fury and his teeth on full display, eyes black as night.

Her lungs are quivering now, begging for oxygen. She tries to raise her arms but they are crushed between her body and his.

This man… no, he's more animal than man. Shouldn't she reason with him as such?

Forcing herself to go limp in his grasp, she does the only thing she is capable of. Clearing her mind of the panic, she whimpers so softly that a human wouldn't have heard.

But he is no human, and his eyes immediately flicker towards her own. Though he doesn't tear his gaze from presumably Edward, his grasp loosens instantaneously.

She sucks in lungful after lungful of air, tears forming in the corners of her eyes as her throat stings ferociously.

"Edward?" she whispers hoarsely.

"Don't struggle or he'll attack. Just be calm, Bella."

"What do I do?" she whispers, being mindful of not allowing her fear to tense her muscles. Gone is the quiet, gentle man. In his place is a snarling vampire. A feral.

His growls vibrate against her, makes her body radiate with his own energy.

"Bella."

She nearly sobs when she hears Carlisle's soft, self-assured voice. He's beside Edward, one of his hands raised in supplementation.

"You need to be calm; we'll get you out of this. Just be calm. Jasper? Jasper, can you understand me?"

Who is Jasper?

Carlisle continues. "Jasper, I know it's hard. Nothing makes sense right now, but you have to let go of Bella. She's just a human, your strength is too much for her. You could kill her."

Jasper must be the man holding her, then. Distantly, she thinks it suits him. Though now is not the time to be thinking of things so trivial… But then again, now that her earlier wake-up scare is fading, she finds that with each slow breath, she calms more and more.

"Carlisle?" she whispers, reluctant to raise her voice.

"We're right here, Bella."

"I… I think it's best if you and Edward leave the house."

"Like hell-" Edward snarls, though he is immediately interrupted by the ferocious roar that comes from Jasper.

It takes a moment to unscramble her brain from the nearly concussive sound, realizing she'd gone utterly limp during it all. So long had she been around vampires with near perfect control that she'd been lulled into a complacency around them. She'd forgotten of their fearsome strength, of the fact that they could break her in two with just one arm. It should terrify her. It really should.

"Jasper," she murmurs, and it was as if a light switch had been flipped. He quiets and drops his head though maintains a steady stare-down on the other two vampires.

"See?" she says in just as quiet a voice. "He's calm around me. I think he trusts me- he knows I can't hurt him. You two need to leave- he'll settle down without two threats staring him down."

Carlisle is obviously hesitant in his reply. "I don't think that's our best course of action…"

"There is absolutely no way we are leaving you here with it," Edward cuts in, though this time he is more mindful of his voice.

"Do you have a better idea?" she challenges. Jasper readjusts his grip on her, his fingers flexing against her. Almost instinctively, she drops her head against his neck and sighs, letting her breath ghost across his skin. "Please, Edward."

The silence that follows suggests a conversation carried on, too low and fast for her human ears to register.

Carlisle speaks again, his voice just as smooth and precise as before. The voice of a doctor, a man in control. "Alright, Bella. Alice is outside. She says it will work. Once we leave, you are to do whatever it takes to get him to let go of you. Do you understand?"

"Yes," she nods against Jasper.

"I'm right outside, Bella," Edward reminds her.

She closes her eyes as the only two capable of saving her leave the house.

"Jasper," she murmurs into the utter silence, opening her eyes once more to stare up at him. His face has relaxed, though he still stares at the closed door with an intensity that makes her swallow. "Jasper," she tries again.

This time, he does look down. His eyes are still black, still creased in worry.

"It's ok…" she soothes, struggling to make enough room so that she might raise her hand. He seems reluctant of the distance, however, and makes sure that there isn't even a millimeter between their chests.

Her voice drops to convey how utterly serious she means her next words. "I won't let them hurt you," she promises soberly. "They won't lay a hand on you." What right does she have to make such empty promises? A human promising to protect a vampire? It's almost laughable. But she means it with every fiber of her being.

His eyes are so somber that her heart aches. What has this man been through to have such sad eyes? It makes her want to wrap him up and hide him away. But for now, they must address the coven anxiously waiting for her outside.

"You need to let me go," she murmurs, beginning to struggle lightly.

A crease forms between his brow and she can't help but wonder how much he truly understands. Is he beyond all form of basic human speech?

"Jasper," she says, louder this time.

He jerks against her, his eyes snapping to her lips and back up to her eyes. "You need to let me go."

"Go?"

His voice. It's like drizzled honey, smooth and low and intoxicating. She shivers in his grips, feels an embarrassing twinge in her lower stomach, made all the more embarrassing by the quiver of his nose and the widening of his pupils. Gods… can he… can he _smell_ her?

Mortified, she begins her struggle anew and he immediately lets her go as if touching her burnt him, leaving her sprawled along the floor.

She watches as he backs away, behaving as if _she_ is the creature capable of tearing him limb from limb.

All of a sudden, a blur shoots forth from the corner of her vision. A chorus of ferocious, blood-chilling noises follow, then she is left in the living room all alone.

…what the hell?

* * *

Grabbing the feral by his neck, Edward hauls him out of the door before he can lay one more hand on his Bella.

This _creature._ It was time to end it. Alice had her fun, but it was time to stop trusting in her little visions and start _acting._

His hands are on either side of the feral's head when it contorts its body, hunching into itself and bucking Edward from it like a bull. Edward lands on his feet a long distance away and roars his challenge.

The feral responds in kind but is cut short when Emmett suddenly grabs it, wrapping both arms around its neck in a sleeper hold.

It bucks and screeches and roars but, in such a weak state, it has no chance of upending their strongest member.

"Time to calm down, buddy," Emmett growls.

Sudden flashes of bloodied corpses, thousands in number, each with frozen faces of terror. The visions are enough to make Edward fall to his knees.

"Edward?" Carlisle asks, hesitating between the struggling feral and his disturbed son.

"Get that thing away from me," Edward snarls, holding his head. "Its mind is the foulest thing I've ever witnessed." He pauses to gag. "There's no good left in it. End it, Emmett!" he demands. "End it!"

Alice's scent invades his nose as she comes close, wrapping her arm around his shoulders as he trembles. "Edward-" she tries to say, but he shoves her away.

"Get off! Emmett!"

The feral is going berserk, twisting and writhing and trying every trick in the book to get away.

It finally resorts to yelling, as it had in the woods.

"Get off!" it screams. "Get off, get off, get off!" If their kind could cry, he'd imagine the feral would be sobbing. Never had he seen one so far gone as this. It was saddening in a way. But more than anything, it sickened him. Edward wanted it gone from his sight, and as far away from Bella as possible. Just the image of it curled around her vulnerable, delicate form… he shudders.

And then she appears, like an angel of fury. Her brunette locks whip behind her as she stumbles outside, her expression nearly as thunderous as the feral's. "What the hell are you doing to him?" she demands, rushing toward Emmett as if she had the strength to break his hold.

Edward grabs her before she gets too close, hauling her back.

If possible, the feral goes even more berserk, managing to whip around and dig his fangs into Emmett's arm. "Fuck," he hisses. "Rose." She's by his side in an instant, attempting to subdue the creature. It takes both Alice and Carlisle to keep it in hand.

Bella herself is throwing a fit in his arms. "Can't you see you're hurting him?!" she demands, snarling as pathetically as a kitten. He would have laughed if her safety wasn't at stake.

"Bella, love. We need to go inside."

"He's scared," she yells ferociously, as alive as he'd ever seen the normally timid girl. "He's just scared. Carlisle! Alice, please." But already they are hauling the enraged feral away, back into the woods and to their house. "Please," she whispers as they vanish from her sight without a hint to suggest they'd been there in the first place. Tears beginning to cascade down her cheeks.

It hurts him to see her so sad. And over that creature, no less. He pulls her inside despite her struggles and protests and forces her head under his chin as he wraps her in a hug and inhales her delectable, mouth-watering scent.

She trembles against him and he realizes she is still crying, now sobbing silently.

"He's just scared," she whispers. "He's just scared."

* * *

I'm absolutely speechless over the amount of support this fic has gotten! Each one of your reviews brings a smile to my face! I am not worthy!

The mystery deepens! What happened to Jasper? Why is Edward such a d-bag? When will Jasper and Bella bang? The questions will never cease!

Sorry I haven't updated sooner; the reason is currently purring on top of my chest (7 week old kitten oh lawd somebody help me... his name is Dexter ;)... )


	6. Chapter 6

"What else are you waiting for? For the entire town to be slaughtered?"

"Edward, please."

"No! I don't understand why we're keeping this, this _creature!_ Why are we endangering the lives of everyone around us? Bella's life?"

"Because it's the right thing to do. And Bella is still alive and well. For him to withhold his hunger around a human… either his control is absolutely remarkable or this is something else entirely. The fact that she wasn't torn to pieces the moment he caught her scent-"

"Enough!" Edward snarled. He got into Carlisle's face, raising his finger and jabbing it into the air. "If that thing escapes again, I don't care how much you want to save it, I will _personally_ see to its destruction- do you understand?"

Carlisle stiffened, his face going hard as marble in the face of his 'son's' challenge.

"He is very sick," the doctor said instead.

Edward bared his teeth and began to pace across their elegant kitchen, too fast for a human to track. "Bella is not to come anywhere near here. If any of you allow her inside, you will deal with me personally."

From upstairs, Emmett's snort was barely covered by Rose's amused shushing.

Glaring, Edward turned and stormed from the house, the faintest sounds of chains rattling echoed from the basement and only fueled his rage further.

* * *

"Bella."

Bella couldn't get his scent off of her mind. Rainwater and mesquite- the most pleasing, gentle combination she'd ever had the fortune of experiencing.

And the way he'd snarled so ferociously- among such perceptive creatures as a vampire, surely she hadn't been the only one to notice that it wasn't anger driving him, but rather fear? Surely…

But they'd been so rough with him, treating him like an animal, the people she'd hesitantly begun to call family. Ever gentle, reliable Carlisle, sweet Alice, her _boyfriend…_ they'd turned into utter strangers yesterday night.

God, he'd been so skinny, so malnourished. Were they feeding him? Were they-

"Bella!"

Bella jerked, her books tumbling from her locker to clatter onto the ground.

"Jesus, sorry." Mike bent down and began to straighten her books into his arms, red flushing into his cheeks.

"No, that was my bad." She accepted her disorganized books with a polite, albeit strained smile and shoved them back into her locker, shutting it with a click and turning back to the teenage boy.

"I was, uh, calling your name for a while."

"Sorry, didn't get much sleep last night." She shifted her backpack and shifted from foot to foot. "Is there something you wanted…?"

"Oh, right," he chuckled, flustered. She wished he'd give up on his little crush. It made her uncomfortable, almost like she was doing something wrong. She wasn't unintentionally leading him on, was she? She hoped not…

She was already making her way out to the parking lot, eager to head home after a mind-numbing day of lectures- not that she'd heard even half of them, too preoccupied with thoughts of her brief, cuddly visitor. Mike trotted at her side like an eager puppy.

"Uh, me and Jess and the rest of the gang are gonna go out to the movies. Did you wanna go?"

"Probably not," she muttered, her mood dropping at the sight of the man leaning against her truck. "I'll talk to you later, ok? Thanks for the invite," she waved at Mike.

"Right, yeah. See you."

Edward's crossed arms made him look like a petulant teenager, the somber glare only adding to the effect. "Is he still pestering you?"

She ignored him, fishing her keys from her pocket and pointedly staring at his chest, willing him to move. She did not have the energy to deal with this right now…

His jaw tightened. "I'm not sure it's safe for you to be driving when you're being so emotional."

Before she could snarl out her frustrations at him, her keys were snatched from her hand in the blink of an eye. Gaping, she watched as her boyfriend smugly opened her truck and sat himself into the driver's seat.

No way…

She gripped the air in front of her, gaping speechlessly for a moment as the frustration swept through her veins like a tidal wave, building in her before cresting into a barely restrained shriek.

Turning on her heel, she walked quickly away. No way was she going to get into that truck with him- absolutely _no way._ How dare he?

A hand pulled on her arm, nearly wrenching her backwards.

Utilizing the tug to her advantage, she whirled around and threw her hand into his stupidly perfect cheek.

He didn't even flinch, even as she gasped and doubled over her throbbing hand.

"Bella," he simpered. "You're only proving my point."

"Damnit, Edward," she hissed.

"Where were you going?"

"I'm walking home."

"You're acting irrationally-"

"Don't even start with me," she snarled, standing up straight and pretending her hand wasn't throbbing in pain.

Edward looked around the parking lot then down at her disapprovingly. "The children are staring."

"Where is he?" she whispered heatedly, knowing he'd hear her.

"Who?"

"Edward…" she began, her voice breaking as her fury closed her throat. She couldn't remember the last time she'd been so angry… aside from last night, when he'd hauled her away from Jasper and into her room against her will.

It was too much, him doting on her and dictating her will as if she were a doll to be played with. Edward used his strength against her, knowing she had little say in the matter.

And she was fed up.

"Where is he?" she asked again, stressing each word.

Edward looked mortified- good, he should. His delicate little girlfriend had never behaved this way before.

"If you're speaking of the feral-"

"Jasper."

"The feral," he said again, topaz eyes growing darker. "Then it is kept securely away from the rest of society. It won't be coming anywhere near you again, you need not worry."

"I'm not worried for _myself_ ," she declared, drawing back. Who was this man standing in front of her? Had he always been such a stranger? "I'm worried for _him._ For Jasper. Are you even feeding him? He was so weak… I could feel every bone in his back."

Edward huffed and crossed his arms again. He looked as if he were about to deny her but then he finally relented. "We are keeping him weak so as to make him more manageable. If he was at his full strength, there'd be a massacre. We wouldn't be able to stop him as easily."

"So, what, you're just going to watch him starve?"

"If I had my way, yes. But," he sniffed, "Carlisle thinks he'll be able to reason with it. Make it come to terms with its past- save it from its madness."

"That's… that's the most idiotic thing I've ever heard," Bella murmured, raising a hand to cover her mouth as tears threatened to leave her.

Edward smirked slowly. "I agree-"

"There's no way to reason with a starving man. Let alone one on the brink of death. Carlisle's only committing cruelty…"

Edward's eyes darkened further. "I think it's time we head home. You've obviously not gotten enough sleep."

He reached forward and grabbed her arm, pulling her towards the truck.

But Bella was distracted with thoughts of the gentle, sweetly-scented male. He was withering away and the Cullens were content with watching him turn into a pile of bones… She'd seen it, when he was standing across from her, looking into her eyes for both reassurance and acceptance, silently seeking her comfort- he was a good person. Simply… lost.

She had to do something. But what?

The click of the door handle brought her out of her stupor and with a jerk she realized Edward was herding her into the passenger seat.

"No," she startled, pushing back and refusing to move another foot.

"Bella, please. You're being ridiculous."

"No, Edward," she said again, pushing back against him when he nudged her forward another step.

" _Bella."_

"No!" she screamed.

The ambient sound of chattering students leaving the school for the day stopped as they all turned to watch the fighting couple.

Using the attention to her advantage, she squirmed against his hold and yelled again. "Let me go!"

Edward, with no other option, immediately let her go and took a step back, raising his hands.

Tossing her hair over her shoulder and straightening her backpack, she resumed her hasty walk.

"I don't want to see you for the rest of the week," she hissed under her breath as she hightailed it across the damp lot.

Seeing a familiar car pulling out of its spot, she hurried into a jog and waved her arms.

"Mike!" she called, grinning when he came to a stop and rolled his window down.

The sounds of Angela, Jess, Tyler, Lauren and Eric called out to her in a friendly hello.

Mike smiled happily as she approached.

"I changed my mind," she smiled apologetically. "Is the invitation still on the table?"

Angela leaned past Mike from the back of the car. "Of course it is, silly. Get your butt in here!"

Bella pushed her way into the crowded car and pretended to ignore the scathing glare being sent her way from across the parking lot.

She had to find a way to help Jasper and she couldn't do so with Edward hovering over her.

* * *

The jam-packed car was filled to the brim with laughter and teasing and shouting.

Before heading to the movie, Mike swerved into a diner at the last second under Eric's hysterical shouting for food and proclamations that starvation was imminent.

Once seated, Angela turned and bumped her elbow against Bella's.

"I'm glad you decided to come along," she murmured, her words going unheard by the rest of the chattering group as they played with the salt shakers and gossiped.

"Yeah," Bella agreed weakly.

"Are you ok? You seem kinda… off."

"Just have a lot on my mind, y'know? Sorry."

"Nothing to worry about. We all have our crud to deal with."

Bella shared a smile with her friend then resumed her introspective thoughts.

If she could somehow get Jasper the blood he needed… but how?

Plan A… sneak into the Cullen house, because where else would he be?, and offer herself up. The only ending to that was her being sucked into a husk, good intentions or not, or she'd be turned. Neither of which she was really prepared for.

Plan B… was there even a plan B? She could kidnap someone. Force them to the Cullen's house and then… who was she kidding?

"Sick scar, dude." Eric was mooning over a slightly raised, white slash running across Mike's forearm.

"Isn't it?" The baby-faced boy looked proud of it, raising it to the light to better show it off.

The girls made the appropriate noises of disgust.

"Got it when I fell off my bike back in elementary school."

"Into what, a barrel of glass?"

"Gravel, but close to it. Yeah, six stitches _and_ I had to get a transfusion."

"Gnarly…" Eric whispered, awe-struck.

Bella jerked as if she'd been electrocuted.

Of course. Of course! She felt brilliant, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips. A transfusion.

A plan began to form in her mind. It was risky and certainly not guaranteed to even work in the first place…but if it would save Jasper's life then she would do everything she could, no matter the risk.

How strange, to be so free, so on the edge.

It was exhilarating.

* * *

She opened the door quietly, padding into the darkened bedroom and whispering, "Charlie…"

Her father snorted and shifted in his bed, then continued snoring away.

"Charlie," she said, this time a bit louder.

"Sng- huh? Bella? What is it?" He sat up and blearily turned on the lamp beside the bed.

"I, uh… the knife slipped. I was just making breakfast…"

"Jeses Christ, Bells!"

Her father reached forward and held his hands over the severe cut marring her forearm.

"Keep pressure on it, Bells. Hold tight, let me grab my keys."

"Ok," she nodded slowly, ignoring the sanguine liquid dripping from her elbow. Just ignore it…

But that rotten, coppery stench- she fought the gag filling her throat, closing her eyes against the dizziness.

She hadn't meant to cut so deep… oh well.

"C'mon, Bells. Let's get you to the hospital. You don't need your bag, sweetie…"

She waved his concern away and allowed him to herd her into the cruiser.

* * *

"Nothing to worry about, just a few stitches. Keep the bandages clean and a steady dose of advil going and she'll be fine." The once-soothing voice of Carlisle now made her want to fidget. It was disconcerting how quickly an opinion could be changed of someone. He meant well, she reminded herself.

"Thank you, Doctor," Charlie replied stiffly, most likely shaking the blonde man's hand.

Bella made sure her eyes were shut tight, breathing softly through her nose.

"Not a problem. I'd suggest letting her get a few hours of rest before bringing her home. There's breakfast being served in the cafeteria if you're hungry- it will be a while before she awakes."

Of course, Charlie could never resist breakfast. He left with Carlisle, the door swinging shut behind them and leaving only the sound of the heart monitor behind.

Bella waited a good two minutes before peeling her eyes open, wincing against the harsh fluorescent lighting.

She sat up slowly, looking down at her newly acquired wound. Thank goodness it was all wrapped up in gauze or else she might be prone to another spell of queasiness.

She had to move quickly- Charlie could put down a meal faster than most. Sliding from the bed, she took a moment to reorient herself before moving to take off the heart monitor covering her index finger, pausing in the very last moment. Wouldn't do to have the alarm blaring.

Shifting to the side as far as the tangle of chords would allow, she reached toward the outlet and yanked the monitor's plug from the wall.

Disentangling herself, she trotted across the room and grabbed up her backpack, slinging it over her gaping hospital gown.

Peering through the cracked doorway, she scanned the halls. Empty- good.

She trotted outside, her heart pounding with adrenaline. Now, where would they keep it? This door?

The man and his nurse looked up sharply.

"Oh! Sorry," she cringed, closing the door and her mind to the image of the old man receiving a sponge bath.

This one?

A broom fell forward as she opened the door. She barely caught it, pausing at the sound of approaching footsteps. She hurried inside the closet, just barely shutting the door.

A pair of nurses chatted away, pausing beside a door just opposite of her hiding spot.

Using a key card, one of the nurses unlocked it with a soft beep. They went inside, reemerging several minutes later.

They were halfway down the hall when Bella dashed across the hall, just barely catching the door before it shut.

Shelves were close to bursting with supplies, from syringes to medication. Perfect. She looked on every shelf, between every canny, dropping boxes of gauze in her haste.

Where is it, where is it… Ah… The giant fridge at the end of the room. That would make sense.

She opened it in a burst of frigid air, shivering softly. There must be hundreds of little red packets, all neatly labeled according to their type. A brief tendril of nausea raised in the back of her throat but she tamped it down. Now wasn't the time.

Unzipping her bag, she grabbed the little plastic bags and shoved them by the handful into it. He'd need a lot…

She filled the bag until she could just barely close it, frowning at the minimal reserves left in the freezer. Hopefully, no one would be needing blood this week…

If she thought about it, she was saving lives. A fair trade, in her opinion.

Stealing back to her room, she threw herself back into her bed and rearranged herself, settling her racing heart.

Ok… she had the blood…

Now how in the hell was she going to get it to him?

* * *

Sorry, no J/B interaction for this one- next chapter for sure! Y'all are the greatest creatures on this green earth, know that? The response to this story is absolutely incredible!

Hope you enjoyed strong!bella- she ain't need no man.

So, I've come to accept that I will one day be an old cat lady. If you'd like to watch my steady descent into madness, come visit me on tumblr (ivachism) and meet my lil Dexter ;)


	7. Chapter 7

You guys… I've done it. I've finally done it.

I've published a book. It's taken me almost a year, innumerable hours of headaches, and many times of tossing my computer into the trash, but I've done it.

It's called Aphelion and you can find it on Amazon under the author name A. E. Alby. I'll put a link in my profile if you'd like to check it out. It's set in the middle ages. Cassia Faramond, a spoiled girl, is petitioned by the god of the moon to help him reclaim his throne. If you'd like to buy it, it's only $4.89! Can't even get a box of goldfish for that price! It would keep me fed while I write more fics for y'all ;)

I'd just like to thank each and every one of you for your kind words and support- it made me keep writing even when I felt particularly shitty at it, lol. It's always been a dream of mine to be published and it has finally happened. Thank you, from the very bottom of my heart.

Now, without further ado, what you really came here for ;)

* * *

"Just get some rest, alright? I'll be home early."

"You don't have to do that. I'll be fine."

"Are you sure, Bells?"

"Just a little cut. I'm fine- just gonna catch up on some homework."

"If you're positive…"

"Dad."

"Alright, alright. Be good, get some sleep."

"Of course."

Bella sat back into her pillows and put on her best face of pure innocence.

Charlie gave her a stern look before finally shutting her door.

She listened intently to his footsteps as he stomped down the stairs. The moment she heard the police cruiser rattle out of the driveway, she was flinging her bed sheets away and stumbling to her closet.

Tearing out of her pajamas, she shoved herself into a plain white t-shirt and a hunter green hoodie, followed by a worn pair of denim jeans and ragged sneakers.

Lastly, she snatched her backpack full of… no, best not to think on that… and sprinted to her rusty old truck- returned by her ever faithful father- doing her absolute best to keep her mind clear of any formally laid plans.

* * *

But even the best laid of plans have their fallacies- even the plans that include not to plan.

Alice looked like an ethereal faerie as she stood in the road, expectantly staring down her truck. The gentle mist rising from the ground only lent to the mystical air of the petite vampire.

Bella's heart sank into her stomach. It was over. Alice would tell Edward and then she'd never see Jasper again… just the thought made her heart wince.

The sound of the truck door creaking open was startling, even to her human ears, and she nearly fainted when Alice plopped herself into the passenger seat.

"Bella," she chirped softly, wrinkling her nose and giving the backpack sat in her lap a distasteful look.

"Alice…"

"I know what you're planning."

Bella waited and when the little pixie didn't elaborate, she said, "Please don't tell him, Alice. Please. Jasper's so sick- I love Carlisle but what he's doing is _wrong._ I can't sit back and watch him starve that man to death, I just can't."

Alice sat back and giggled.

A brief flare of rage thrummed through her stomach. "You're laughing at me?"

Alice shrugged. "Everyone's hunting right now. I'm on baby-sitting duty. They'll be back in about two hours."

Bella felt disbelief course through her veins. "Hu… what?"

"Make it count!" Alice chirped, leaning forward and giving her a tight hug. And just like that, she vanished back into the woods.

Is this what it felt like to be in a car accident? Whip lashed and thrown around and left with an absolute confusion in which you could only utter three words? Because that's all Bella could do as she sat back into her seat and breathed, "What the fuck…"

* * *

Driving up to the house, she couldn't help but look every which way, just waiting for someone to pop up and ruin her carefully laid plans. But as she pulls up to the driveway, everything is silent and still.

Shutting the truck, the sudden silence made her sit back and really contemplate what she was about to do.

Carrying such a large amount of blood to a starving vampire… she was just asking to be killed, wasn't she? But his eyes… they'd been so sad, so full of suffering. She had no choice but to help. If he killed her, so be it, but she had a very strong suspicion that he would sooner die than raise a hand to her.

Gathering her backpack, she walked to the front door. Open. Oh, Alice- what had you seen? Surely the pixie would tell her if her life was in imminent danger, right? Then again, she'd been behaving so strangely, ever since Jasper was brought in by the Cullens.

Entering the home, she gripped the straps of her bag and took a deep breath. Ok. She could do this. This is for him. For him.

She started by searching upstairs. Edward's room, the study, Emmett and Rose's and Alice's room respectively.

Nothing.

Downstairs was the same story.

He was in the house, right? That's what Alice had led her to believe- it's what Edward had been so adamant about. So where the hell is he?

She's beginning to grow impatient, each second ticking by bringing her closer to having to make a quick retreat. What if she didn't find him in time? Would she have to go home? Surely the blood would go bad by then- could vampires even eat spoiled blood?

A soft rustle sounded from the floorboards. She held her breath, not daring to move a muscle.

There- again, the gentlest of rattling sounded right beneath her feet. Gasping, she fell to her knees and pressed her ear to the floor. There-! The sound was much clearer. They must have a basement!

Heart pounding a million beats per minutes, she tore through the house, ripping every door open and slamming it shut when it didn't hold her shaggy, emaciated vampire.

And then… and then, she opened a door and there it was.

A staircase leading down into a pitch black, musty room. The basement.

Bella wavered at the foot of the stairs, waiting for her eyesight to adjust. It wouldn't do to have come this far only to bust her head open from falling down the stairs.

As she waited, she squinted into the darkness and paused before hesitantly breathing into the air, "…Jasper?"

* * *

"…Jasper?"

He flinched in his bindings and went rigidly still. Surely this was a dream- surely that scent wasn't truly here.

But when he raised his head, there she was, like a vision. She was perched on the stairs, squinting into the darkness, her gaze roaming right over him.

His lips part as he breathes in her gentle, unobtrusive scent, lets it coat his tongue. It's better than… than…

He breathes in deeper and, if possible, stills even more in his bindings.

Whatisthatsmellwhatisthatsmell _whatisthatsmell_?

His throat is on fire, as if he swallowed a handful of burning embers. It's the most painful experience that he can recall.

Just like that, he's panting and writhing in his chains, pulling against the rattling links with all of his strength. He doesn't even budge.

Finally, he resorts to calling for her, trying to tempt her into coming closer, this girl with the gentle and intoxicating scent. He croons lowly, continuously, so that she might locate him in the darkness.

She stills when his calling reaches her.

He croons again, doing his best to sit up as straight as possible lest this female think him weak.

"Jasper?" she says again, finallyfinally _finally_ taking the first few steps down the creaking wooden stairs.

With every inch she comes closer, he grows more frantic. His entire body heaves with his sharp inhales, jaw hanging open as he coats his entire mouth in the scent. Closerclosercloser just come closer!

A hidden instinct, one not often indulged, flares to life in him and he remembers how pleased females were to hear him purr. It starts off rattling in his chest, an awkward vibration that stirred in his throat but he picks up the rhythm quickly, crooning and cooing and purring for her to just come _closer!_

She blindly makes her way forward, so closer so close! Closer! His purring intensifies as he strains in his bonds. She's so near! Only a few more steps. Closer and closer and-

The feeling of her hand against his chest makes him shudder and pause in his symphony of calls. Her touch is unlike any other. It doesn't sting- it doesn't hurt… it feels… good… right.

"There you are," she murmurs, raising her other hand and reaching blindly for his jaw. She traces the sharp line there and he bows his head so that she might have a better reach- anything to keep her close.

He starts up his purr again, softer now that she is near.

"What have they done to you?" she wonders, horrified, as her hands trail down to his arms, finding the cruel metal manacles wrapped around his wrists. She pulled on them, rattled them, followed their lengths to the fish-eye hooks wedged into the concrete wall.

"So fucking cruel…" an unknown emotion chokes her words.

He inhales sharply and bends down lower, crooning loudly. Gods he just wants that fucking scent closer. What is it whatisitwhatisit?!

"Oh! I'm so stupid."

She stepped away and he immediately mourned the loss of her soft heat. Before he could begin calling for her again, however, she was throwing the backpack from her shoulders and unzipping it.

There… the scent wafted upwards with her movements and he felt himself growing cloudy, suspended in a misty red haze.

"Ok… I brought you some… s-some…. Anyway. I don't really know how to… give this to you? I only ask that you don't… well, just please don't hurt me, ok? Jasper? Can you hear me?"

He's gasping down air, straining forward as far as he can, shaking with his weakness and hunger.

The moment she held up the little plastic bag before his lips, he dove forward and sunk razor-sharp teeth into its surface. A pleased rumble left him as he sucked down the pure, life-giving essence. It's beautiful, it's wonderful, the fucking _taste._ It's unlike anything else. He can't get enough- more more moremoremoremore _more._ When the packet is empty, he retracts his teeth and snarls viciously, vibrating with untamed energy.

The moment the next packet is timidly offered, he rips into it with such viciousness that the life-giving girl is spattered in the sanguine liquid. She flinches but dutifully prepares the next bag.

Nineteen packs follow in similar succession. It's amazing, the energy suddenly flooding his veins and making his very body feel electric. He finishes off the final bag and slumps forward, utterly filled for the first time in… ever?

He feels… content. Not quite safe, no, not yet, but content. And it's thanks to the gentle, wisp of a girl. When he lifts his head, a far easier feat than not even an hour ago, he can see her cheeks and sides of her neck are spattered with blood.

He pulls and one of the manacles snap like glass beneath his strength.

The girl flinches but before she can move too far, he's already got his arm wrapped around her. Hauling her forward and into his lap, he immediately sets to dragging his tongue over the stray droplets marring her perfect skin, holding her close.

She squeezes her eyes shut and goes rigidly still, digging her fingers into his arms. Her heart flutters between their chests like a delicate bird and, as he drops his head lower and licks the hollow of her throat, it stutters and picks up speed.

Another scent floods the room, heady and thick and utterly unavoidable. He stills as his nostrils quiver. This scent…

He moans softly and gently presses his teeth into her skin, just on the edge of tearing it. This scent is better than even the red liquid.

His hands ghost across her sides, up and down, reaching further down to the source of her heat. He touches her and-

She jumps like a frightened horse, flailing away from him and gasping down lungfuls of air. She shakes, holding herself, and he's not much better, panting in her scent and quivering with a strange need.

"I'm sorry," she whispers. "I-… I need to… go." She trips over her feet as she turns.

She's leaving? Already?

He begins to purr softly and when that doesn't work, he croons loudly for his female to return.

But she disappears up the stairs with one last glance his way.

… what did he do wrong?


	8. Chapter 8

Yeesh... long time, right? Sorry! I've been too busy writing to... write. Yea... I'm so sorry!

I must thank each and every one of you with every ounce of me! I've never written a fic that went over 100 reviews! I've read every single one over and over and I cherish them very much. Y'all are all so kind and your insights make me blush and want to try even harder for this fic.

On a side note, I must insist on promoting myself (becuase I'm a poor, smol little bean)... I wrote some erotica... yeah, I know, I know. And I'm not sorry- it was a lot of fun- I highly recommend writing it some time. A few short little stories on kindle. PM me if you want a link. ;)

Please enjoy! Expect an update soon to make up for my hiatus.

-iva

* * *

"What did you do?"

Bella's eyelids fluttered and she wriggled in her bed, pulling her covers over her head blearily.

"Bella?" A familiar voice snarled. "What did you do?"

"Mngh?" she groaned.

All at once, she was torn from her bed and dumped unceremoniously on the floor.

Edward stared down at her, holding her wrist high above her head, his looming and menacing figure immediately chasing away any remaining vestiges of sleep.

"What did you do?" he snarled again.

She'd never seen him so angry and, as pain lanced up her arm, she fought the prickle of tears threatening to fill her eyes. "What," she gritted, "are you talking about?"

His eyes were obsidian, glittering not with joy nor amusement as she'd come to associate with him but feral indignation. "You're a liar!"

"You're scaring me!"

" _I'm_ scaring you? _Me?!_ Not the feral freak you decided to feed? How'd you do it, huh? I can smell human blood all over the basement but it's not yours. Whose is it, Bella?"

She'd known it was inevitable- the exposure of her decision to favor Jasper's health over her boyfriend's 'command'. No matter how careful she'd have stepped, no matter how quickly she'd have stolen away, there was no hiding her scent.

He saw the sinking realization dawn on her face and grinned maliciously. "Did you really think I wouldn't find out?"

"No…" she said, barely above a whisper. She was lost for words in the face of his rage. Her arm throbbed and she twisted it in his hold futilely.

Edward suddenly kneeled down, taking her chin in his hand ungently and forcing her to gaze back into his own creased in rage. "Where is he, then? Tell me."

"Where-...?" Bella blinked slowly, trembling despite herself.

The hand on her chin tightened and she swore she felt the bone creak beneath the steel bands of his fingers.

A cry of pain escaped her, one he sealed away with a fervent kiss that twisted her stomach nauseatingly.

She tried to turn her head away but he held her still, smirking humorlessly when she took his bottom lip between her teeth and bit viciously. He didn't even flinch.

Slowly pulling away from the passionless kiss, he spoke in a more sedated tone. "You are _mine._ You know and I know that we are mates. You cannot let this come between us."

Bella trembled, choked down a sob, and refused to meet his eyes. "You're hurting me," she rasped numbly, still reeling from the assault.

And just like that, his horrid grip on her released and he stepped away from her, a startled look on his face.

Holding her swelling wrist with her hand, she ducked her head and shivered against the nauseating current of fear filling her veins. This creature… this wasn't the one she'd come to love.

"Bella…" he whispered softly.

"Get out."

"I didn't mean to-"

" _Get out!"_ she screeched, as vicious as a raging mountain lion.

Edward looked aghast, paler than normal, as his lips moved but not a sound left him.

He hesitated but when she lifted her chin and leveled her watering, burning eyes on him, a look of anguish crossed his face before he disappeared in a blink of an eye.

The curtains fluttered softly from his retreat.

Bella shuddered a breath, turning her face into her bed at her side and stifling the sob that wanted to leave her.

Taking a deep, shuddering breath, she managed to build a flimsy dam against the raging river of emotion threatening to flood her. It held, but just barely.

Composing herself, she forced her erratic brain to concentrate. She needed to _focus._ Now wasn't the time to cry.

' _Where is he?'_ Edward had demanded.

A faint tingle started in the tips of her fingers as realization flooded her.

Jasper had escaped.

* * *

He streaked through the obsidian forest, a mere blur beneath the avid gaze of the full moon.

The stretch of his muscles as he sprinted, the harsh breaths filling his lungs, the feel of sodden earth beneath his feet. What a wonderful, blissful feeling.

The newfound strength coursing through his long deprived limbs made a purr threaten to overtake him but he swallowed it down- overtly aware of the sounds within the near-silent forest.

The coven would be coming after him soon enough. He knew not why they pursued him so restlessly- what was he to them? Why did they despise him so? He wished they'd stay within their little marble-enclosed cage and _leave him alone._

As he leapt across a ravine, he knew he'd be useless in the face of their numbers. Perhaps one on one he'd stand a chance, but even that was questionable. He still had many more meals to go before returning to his former glory- the very same glory that had doomed him in the first place.

Like dust in the wind, the rare moment of lucidity passed and his past was once more lost to him.

Shaking his head, he focused on the task at hand.

Escape.

But where?

He didn't know. Just _away._

And the girl?

The girl?

The sweet-smelling, gentle, life-giving girl- _the girl._

He came to a sudden stop, dragging furrows through the dirt with his feet.

The girl. How could he have forgotten? His mind was a tangle, a knot of strings that refused to unsnarl. Gripping his head, he held onto the memory of her with a white-knuckled grip.

He couldn't forget her- he wouldn't.

In his chest, a terrible pain took root. His lips peeled away from his teeth and his movements became frantic, picking up a speed he hadn't thought his body capable of.

The pain in his chest had a strange pull, like a piece of thread connecting him to some unknown tether.

He was helpless but to follow.

* * *

Bella paused at the edge of the front door's threshold.

What the hell was she doing?

Was she just going to go off and wander through the forest, balefully calling for Jasper?

Yes, she realized with dawning confidence.

Was she an idiot?

Yes to that as well, she conceded.

Something beyond her was begging, crying for her to go forth and follow this… _feeling._ A strangeness of thought that made her chest literally _ache._

What was _wrong with her?_

Just as she was taking a step forward and out into the night, a force collided with her front and brought her stumbling back into her house.

Gasping fearfully, she inhaled to scream when a familiar scent filled her nose and lined her tongue.

"Jas-…per…" she realized, reaching up to grab his shoulders.

He was hovering over her, staring with blood-red eyes intently into her own. His hands gripped her hips not ungently, fingers curling into the gentle swell there.

He heaved for unnecessary breath, his hair tousled and shirt torn.

"God, Jasper, come here." She ushered him inside, shutting the door with her foot and glancing out the windows.

Thank goodness Charlie was away on a fishing trip. It was doubtful he'd have taken the appearance of her feral… friend? –no that didn't sound quite right… acquaintance?... nonetheless, it was safe to say Charlie wouldn't be pleased.

As she turned back, Jasper suddenly dipped forward, resting his nose against the hollow of her throat and breathing deeply, holding her still with his newly renewed grip upon her hips.

She shuddered at the warm exhale against her neck, instinctually canting her head to the side so as to give him better access.

Her submission brought a purr rumbling to life in his chest, a sound that curled her toes.

The warmth suffusing just beneath her navel made her rub her thighs together and only then did her mind catch up with her body.

Bella's breath shivered as she gripped his shoulders, rising to caress his neck and his jaw.

"They didn't hurt you, did they?" She gently tugged him from her and he went willingly. Looking into his scarlet gaze, she made her fond, worried gaze as open as possible. "Please answer me."

He dropped his gaze, caressed her waist with his thumbs. "No…" he muttered hoarsely.

His voice made a heady, dizzy feeling flood her mind. Shaking her head, she took a steadying breath. "They're looking for you. Edward-"

At once, his face creased into a snarl and his eyes turned a haunting obsidian.

Holding in her breath and fighting the frightful gasp wanting to leave her, she stilled in his grip.

"Is that…" he murmured, "is that… the scent on you?" The bridge of his nose furled in rage. "He touched you."

Far more delicate than she would've ever imagined, he held her wrist within his hand, inspecting the darkening purple already spreading across the abused limb.

Silently, she bit her lip and fought the sob wanting to rise from her chest.

A sharp hiss left him as he watched her struggle.

Holding her wrist between both of his own, he dipped his head and brushed his nose against her own.

She held her breath, petrified. His lips were but inches away, an inversed mirror of where Edward had been but an hour ago.

But this… was different. He was hesitant, gentle before her. His eyes flashed, not with rage, but fierce indignation.

Where Edward had been possessive, this 'feral' before her was protective.

"Can I…" he swallowed thickly.

Tangling her hands into his locks, she tugged ever so gently and that was all the answer he needed.

Chaste, he brushed their lips together as gentle as a butterfly.

Her stomach bucked and twisted and she held onto him for dear life. Oh, if just this touch inspired such a reaction, what potential lay ahead?

Her mind went dark as his tongue, hotter than a fireplace poker, swept across her lower lip. Over and over, he lapped there.

Where Edward had captured her- she realized. He was replacing his scent with his own.

Growling fiercely, he brought her closer until her throbbing breasts rubbed against his chest.

When she gasped at the sublime pressure, he took the opportunity to invade her completely. Tangling their tongues together, their teeth clacked in a feral battle of passion.

He, claiming her and she, fighting to keep her head afloat.

She'd never been kissed so fiercely before- so passionately. It made her want to howl as that ever-present ache in her chest that had faded in Jasper's presence reappeared, though much lower than before.

Squealing as he nipped her lip, she pressed further into him.

Strong hands grabbed her hips, effortlessly raising her and urging her to wrap her legs around his lean hips. Due to their height difference, she ended up squeezed around his taut abdomen.

Whimpering, she bucked futilely against him.

His hands tightened, nearly dragged her down his body, but something, some damned thing, made him go completely still. He slowly pulled away from her, gasping for breath. Pressing his face into her neck as she whined with frustration, he snarled and pressed the fronts of his teeth against her neck.

Going utterly still, they both fought to regain their breath, each muscle tense against the other.

One by one, her senses returned.

Bella opened her eyes, unaware of when she'd closed them, and looked to find Jasper in the same situation.

… what the hell was that?

Never had she felt such an intense need… even now, as he slowly released her to stand on her own, she ached terribly with a foreign need, one that beat in time with her heartbeat.

Fighting for strength, she leaned bodily into him and he, for his part, stood firmly for her as she regained her wits.

"They're looking for you," she said slowly, pushing away to look up.

His eyes were still dark, lidded with an emotion that made her want to both press closer and run away at once.

"We… we need to leave," she murmured. Yes, they needed to leave.

He was, for all intents and purposes, a newborn- the same as the tales Edward had told of their kind. Slaves to their ever-changing emotions, unaware of the new world around them.

She couldn't leave him to face it alone, not when she could help.

 _And what of you?_ Her mind inquired. _Did you happen to forget school? Your father?_

School paled in the face of this man, lost and displaced.

School would always be there, waiting for her to return, always welcoming.

But Jasper?

He needed her _now_.

And Charlie… Charlie would commend her, she liked to think, helping a man in his time of need.

Edward only made her decision that much easier. His assault… she shuddered and replaced those cold lips with the warm feeling of Jasper's kiss.

Yes, it was time for them to go. Go where? Anywhere.

A thrill filled her as she gripped his shoulders fervently, pushing those confusing, lust-filled feelings away for the time being- now wasn't the time.

"We're leaving tonight."


	9. Chapter 9

The radio was having a hard time of keeping up with the faster-than-light speed at which the tuning knob was being spun.

Bella watched out of the corner of her eye as Jasper fiddled with it, wide-eyed and hunched over in the passenger seat as the glowing green lights indicating the station number switched sporadically.

She cleared her throat as she turned onto the main highway that would take them out of Forks. "There's music, talk shows, all sorts of stuff on there."

Jasper made no indication that he heard her and she resigned herself to the quiet drive. As the yellow stripes zipped by and her truck faithfully ate up the pavement mile by mile, a sedate panic was beginning to sink down her throat and into her stomach.

God, she was really doing this, wasn't she? She was leaving town, ditching it, so-long-see-you-never gone…

Was this a good idea? Was it? Oh gods, she'd acted impulsively and now… and now! It made her sick to her stomach but a traitorous voice raised its ugly head in her mind and venomously whispered _'Is he worth all of this trouble?'_

She shied away from the thought, gritted her teeth and gripped the steering wheel tighter.

Of course he was. Of course… but… but what if-? Oh gods… what-

"I like music…"

Softer than a breath, just barely heard over the a/c spluttering comfortably warm air into the cab (another invention that had taken some time to explain when they'd puttered out of the driveway. And of course, that only happened after she'd gotten over her recent bout of blushing that came about whenever she so much as looked his way).

Surprised, she turned and watched him.

He was a quiet one, that was for sure. But the way his eyes darted nervously towards her and back to the radio, it was obvious he was making a valiant effort to open up to her, no matter his nerves. In a way, it was like a child making conversation with another. Vague and general statements meant to open up the other to a possible friendship.

He obviously didn't know where to start, what to say, and so he said something as trivial as his affinity for music…

Endearing, she mused.

Cautiously, like reaching for a kicked hound, she reached for the radio which he still fiddled with.

"If you'll let me…" she ventured to say, and he immediately sat back, ceding the radio to her. She tuned it into a frequency that began emitting a gentle acoustic guitar, the calmest music she could find. Wouldn't do to start him off with electric guitars or dubstep- the poor man would have a heart attack. "Do you like country? It can be soothing."

He sat back in his seat, intertwined his fingers and rested them on his lap as a thoughtful look crossed his face.

As the song filled the truck, he dipped his head and looked out of the window.

Bella turned her gaze back to the road. Get out of Forks. As far away as possible. And _then…_ then she'll decide where to go from there. With a valiant effort, she was attempting to not make any solid decisions. Although Alice had proven to be somewhat trustworthy, there was still a small, niggling worry in Bella's mind that there was something beneath the surface of her best friend, unspoken and worrying.

"What year is it?" Jasper wondered, still in that same whispery-soft voice.

Bella knew he was not from this time by his fascination of normal things- the truck, the a/c- common things for this day and age that he instead found extraordinary. But to hear him so plainly confirm it was jolting.

"2005," she murmured, watching warily as his shoulders tensed.

"Who… who won the war?"

She grimaced. "Which one?"

Jasper let out a shaky breath and she was again reminded of the feral man she had first met. He was but a child in this world, unknowing and naïve.

Obviously older than a hundred years, given his lack of knowledge of even electricity.

Gods, a hundred years old _at least._ She looked at the young man beside her underneath her lashes. What a geezer.

If only she could just answer all of his questions. She could see them brimming in his eyes, clamoring over one another in a rush to be asked. But he refused to speak them.

Did he not trust her yet?

Or… did he not trust himself?

The sound of the window rolling open brought her from her thoughts. Jasper jerked his hand back from the button, looking guiltily at her.

Chuckling, she said, "That's alright. It's supposed to open. If you keep holding the button it'll go down further."

He turned back and, with an ounce of hesitation, sent the glass sliding down. And up. And down again.

Chewing on her lip and gritting her jaw, she refused to laugh. She doubted he'd appreciate it.

Jasper sat back as a cool wind entered the open window. He crossed his arms only to uncross them when yet another thing caught his attention. This time, the overhead visor. He opened it and closed it, watching the small emergency light click on and off.

When that lost its entertainment value, he sat back in his chair and shifted. Evidently, he was easily bored.

Tapping his fingers against the door, he rolled his neck and looked back out the window as verdant forest flew by. Sticking a hand out the window, he wriggled his fingers through the fast breeze.

Goodness, he was like a child on a long road trip. She should have brought a little movie player along to keep him distracted, she thought with some humor.

…No, that'd probably raise even more unvoiced questions.

Books, then.

As Jasper took to fiddling with the radio again, sudden inspiration struck.

"I have an idea," she chirped happily, grimacing and rushing to turn off the radio when he unwittingly settled on a screeching, death-metal band.

A homely woman made her way out of the building, too busy fiddling with her phone to notice the two figures peeking at her from the old truck in the corner of the parking lot.

As the woman got into her car and puttered off, Bella grinned and almost tapped Jasper on the shoulder before hesitating. Perhaps he'd prefer it if a human didn't keep poking and prodding him? _Though he hadn't been discouraging of it before_ , a voice whispered. She jerked away from that train of thought.

Keeping her hands to herself, she instead cleared her throat. "Jasper?"

He turned from where he'd been watching the woman drive away, as fascinated by vehicles as he had been the first time he'd seen one.

"Are you sure you're up for this? It's ok if you're not."

He shook his head and turned a steady glare on the building. Only hesitating a moment, he opened the door and got out.

Bella followed dutifully, trotting behind his long strides.

"There might be an open door somewhere around the back of the building…" she mused, peeking up at the windows.

But when she looked back down, Jasper already had his hand on the front door's handle.

"No-!"

He jerked it open, the glass front shattering onto the pavement and the metal frame crumpling like a piece of paper.

Bella waited with baited breath for an alarm to start screeching.

Nothing.

Jasper was already prowling inside, stopping short at the sight.

Bella sighed and promised herself to give him a full lesson on basic security and its ability to notify the _police_ later.

For now, though….

"I've never seen so many books in my life," Jasper murmured quietly, always quietly.

Yes, the library was quite impressive. Rows upon rows of musty, worn tomes just waiting to be read, two floors full of knowledge.

"The history section is this way," she said.

Bella stopped pretending she was reading an hour ago.

After all, the sight before her was too riveting to not watch.

The pages flew by in a blur, waving before his unblinking eyes as he sat as still as a predator. Each book was progressively finished in thirty seconds or so, set aside in a steadily growing pile that was getting to be taller than her.

He'd yet to say a word, steadily advancing from the Neolithic era to the Norman Conquest, from the Incas to the Native Americans, from the Civil war, the cold war, all the way up to Desert Storm.

She wondered idly from which time he came from, her chin propped in her hand as she reclined in a comfy, padded chair. It was impossible to tell- he was as mysterious as the first day she'd met him. Perhaps he was a settler. The thought of him in a pilgrim's hat brought her some short-lived amusement but it quickly faded. What if he was ancient? One of the first?

It floored her to think of the decades he might have seen, of what knowledge he held.

As the clock ticked and the pile continued to build, her eyelids became heavier and heavier. It was peaceful here, surrounded by knowledge and the faint light of streetlamps peeking through the windows. A fan hummed gently from the help-desk, accidentally left on for the night. The white noise had her sinking further into her chair, comforted by the sounds of rustling pages. He was safe. They both were. And for now, that had to be enough.

Her book slipped from her limp fingers and she fell eagerly into sleep's embrace.

"Miss. _Miss."_

Bella jerked awake, a startling beam of light blinding her for a moment. Holding her hand up, she blinked back to consciousness.

A man in a security uniform, his cap low over his eyes, was pointing his flashlight in her face, standing over her chair.

"Get up," he growled, "I'm calling the police."

His words meant less to her than a passing gnat. It was still nighttime though the stack of books had multiplied since she'd been asleep. But one thing was missing…

Craning her head every which way, her heart beginning to quicken, she looked for a familiar mane of wild blonde hair.

"Hey," the guard snapped, reaching down and grabbing her shoulder with a meaty hand. "I told you to get up. Who the hell breaks into a _library?_ "

The moment his hand closed around her, a sound akin to a mountain lion sounded from the shadows.

The security guard whipped around.

"Who's there?" He whispered, unsettled. Slowly, the beam of his flashlight went to the location of the demonic growl, illuminating her wayward charge.

The moment she saw him, she immediately remembered the first time they'd met. The unhinged, wild look in his eyes, the barely repressed, predatory tension that stiffened his shoulders and lent him a menacing, wild aura.

Terrifying, for sure. A true predator in his own right.

But Bella noticed, not his lethality, but his eyes- wide as saucers- and his hands that trembled so violently.

Huffing, he clapped a hand over his mouth and nose even as he unconsciously took a step forward.

His eyes bled black in the flashlight's gaze. He was fighting with every ounce of strength within him to resist his natural instincts.

"Jasper," she murmured softly, pitching her voice as soothingly as she could. "You need to fight it. Don't let it overwhelm you. This isn't who you are."

"On your knees, now!" the guard shouted, unconsciously tightening his hold on her.

A soft, muted groan sounded from behind Jasper's hand as his brow knit.

"Jasper-"

Bella didn't complete her sentence.

The guard, having tired of the stand-off, shoved her aside so that he could use his free hand to reach for the can of pepper spray hanging off his belt.

Landing roughly against the cheap carpet, she got her knee beneath her only to stop short.

The flashlight had landed across the room, just barely providing enough light to illuminate the horror scene before her.

Jasper crouched, knees on either side of the guard's shoulders, hunched over himself and mouth firmly attached to the man's broken neck.

A mixture of growls and snarls poured from his chest, eyes closed in bliss.

It had all happened in a split second.

She fought herself for a moment. Gone was the gentle, reserved man that had fiddled with her truck's radio. In his place, a man run on instinct and instinct alone.

Would that instinct have any leniency for her survival?

Best not to find out.

So engrossed in his meal, he didn't notice as she crept to her feet. When he didn't attack her, she took a step backwards. Then another, and another. If she could just get out of the library and give him some time, maybe he'd come to her clear-headed and back to normal. One could only hope.

But as she made it to the shattered door, a stray piece of glass crunched beneath her shoe.

She didn't even have time to blink before a force was plummeting into her side, sending her tumbling to the ground in an ungainly tangle of limbs.

A warm weight pressed to her chest kept her from immediately getting up.

Jasper, with eyes as black as the sky outside.

Her breath left her for a moment. Even bathed in blood, even lost as he was to animalistic instincts, he was beautiful.

A perfect predator, enamoring his prey even as he went for its throat.

But this predator… well, he _did_ go for her throat. But instead of sinking his teeth into the delicate skin, he merely nuzzled deep into the crook there and stayed.

The harsh scent of blood reached her nose and she gagged, turning her head away from him. He merely followed, grabbing the side of her face and dragging her back to him.

Fighting to calm herself, she wound her arms through his and over his back to clap them over her mouth, squeezing her eyes shut. _Calm down,_ she thought. _Just calm down. This is Jasper._ _He won't hurt me._

Peeling her eyes open was, unfortunately, a big mistake. Locking eyes with a mangled corpse isn't, in fact, good for one's mood.

Lurching up against him as her fight-or-flight took hold, she grabbed his shoulder with one hand and dug the front of her teeth against his neck as fearful gasps left her. If she nestled closer to his hair, she could escape the bloody scent and smell only him.

She did so, taking deep breaths as if she were drowning. Her heart hammered away, begging her to run.

His arms tightened around her, dragging her up into his chest as he bowed over her.

Together, they became slaves to their own instincts. Hers, from fear.

And his- a will to dominate.

* * *

AN: I have a very serious problem. I'm a perfectionist. There are some things I'm not satisfied with in this story and I've been torn between scrapping it or just leaving it alone forever. But then I punched myself, forced myself to sit down and write, and made a promise- I'll simply rewrite this whole mess when I finish it. So THERE. ;)

Thanks for all of the support, I wouldn't have come back without it.

-iva

stupid ass guard was gonna mace the god of war lul.


	10. Chapter 10

The little thing was rigid below him. She was holding her breath, so tense that he could hear her muscles spasm.

What was wrong with her? Why was she so still? Was she not pleased with his protection? He would have killed the man sooner but _something_ inside of him had been hesitant in doing so.

Oh well. That strange, niggling voice of reason was gone. In its place, a brutal and calculating creature.

By all means, his instincts were begging him to take her right there. She carried that degenerate's scent on her shoulder and all he wanted to do was have her screaming with bliss just feet from that fucker's corpse. Heaven help the man foolish enough to lay a hand on his mate.

But she seemed… unwilling at the moment, if her stilted breathing was anything to go by. Though it pained him, he knew he'd have plenty of time to take her later. For now, though…

Winding his arms beneath her waist, he hoisted her up as he stood. Holding her to him, a brief thrill shot through him as she instinctively clung tighter to him and hid her face against his neck. She knew where to seek comfort. Him. _Himhimhim and no one else. Never anyone else._ He'd lie bleeding and broken and still would destroy anyone who tried to come between them.

Speaking of…

Before he left, he made sure to pause by the drained corpse. With guilty delight, he sent it careening across the room, shattering against the wall with a thunderous, muted crackle of torn sinew and cracked bones. All from a spiteful kick.

Humming his satisfaction, he absently caressed his suddenly whimpering female and left the building that reeked of livestock and dust.

* * *

"Hey."

Bella groaned and shifted against her uncomfortable bed.

"Miss?"

Growling under her breath, she shifted again.

"Move any more and you're gonna meet ten feet of air and a mouthful of dirt.

 _That_ woke her up.

"Wha-" was all she got out before fear tightened her throat abruptly.

A tree. She was in a god-damned tree, perched on one of the wider limbs. How in the hell-

And there was Jasper, staring up at her from the tree's base with a puzzled albeit amused expression on his face.

His voice floated up to her, honey-smooth and just as sweet. "Are you alright? Do you need any help?"

The clothes the Cullens had somehow managed to force him into were somewhat torn, a sizeable amount of dark dried blood staining the front of his grey tee. She shivered.

"Jasper? I don't- why are we in a forest?"

A strong gust of wind rustled the leaves of the trees, somewhat swaying her branch, making her cling tighter with fingers turned to white-knuckled claws. The rough bark tore into her skin.

One of his eyebrow's twitched, looking up at her with a pondering quality. His head tilted contemplatively, lips tugged into a frown. He looked at her like she was a strange experiment. He ducked his head and restlessly ran his hand over his hair and rubbed the back of his neck.

"I don't mean to offend but…" he huffed a humorless laugh and looked back up at her. "I'm not in a right state of mind, I think. You know my name but I'm afraid I don't know yours."

…what? She nearly fell off her branch right there. Straightening herself at the last minute, she stared open-mouthed at the slightly apologetic man below her.

He didn't know her? He _didn't know her?_ What the _hell_ was going on?

He'd barely uttered ten words to her for the entire time that she'd known him and now he was speaking in full sentences, not a trace of his previous feral nature to be seen. In his place, a polite young man that would've passed as human if his eyes weren't the color of dying embers.

And something else was niggling at her, though she couldn't quite place it.

"You wouldn't happen to have any rope on you?"

She looked at him like he'd grown a second head.

Jasper shrugged. "Figured a gal in the business of climbing trees would have a way of getting _down_ from them."

A joke. He'd cracked a joke. Who. Was. This. Man.

"You're a quiet one, aren't you?" he mused, a soft smile warming his features. "Well, it can't be helped. I'll just have to catch you." He held out his arms expectantly.

 _That_ was it. An accent. Jasper had an _accent._ A soft twang that brought to mind old western movies. The way some of his i's turned into ah's. The way he overemphasized vowels while prolonging others. A Texan drawl if she'd ever heard one.

Her heart skipped a beat. And his smile…

He cocked his head again- a habit, she was coming to realize. "Are you okay?" he asked again, this time the levity gone from his voice.

Finding her voice, she stopped just short of slapping her cheeks. "I'm… sorry. I'm just really confused right now. I'm not _normally_ like this," she rambled, to her increasing humiliation. "I mean, I just woke up in a tree- wouldn't that make any girl freak out? And you-" She suddenly ceased talking and swallowed harshly.

This was too weird. Why was she acting so stupidly? She'd been so comfortable around him before and now it was like she was scrambling to piece together a coherent sentence.

His own eyes had taken on a veil of confusion- at her own accent- or rather lack of one, she realized distantly.

"Ok, ok. I'm- I'm coming down, ok?"

His confusion vanished quickly, replaced with that boyish charm. "Come on down, darlin'. I'll catch you."

Bella's heart fluttered distantly. Darling? Oh god, could he see her blush? Of course he could see it. No matter how human he was acting, he was still a vampire. Though he was acting like that was the last thing he could possibly be.

Off track, Bella! Before she could think, second-guess herself, she threw her legs over the branch and slipped down.

A moment of weightlessness and then her waist was being cradled by two hands, gently lowering her until her feet touched the dirt.

Bella stared up at him despite herself. He was tall. How had she not noticed that before?

Jasper's brow creased, no doubt puzzled by her actions. Nonetheless, a heart-droppingly charming, flirtatious smirk graced his face. Her stomach twisted. Jasper, the feral, was charming her socks off. What.

"What's your name?"

Abruptly she stepped away. "Did you hit your head? Is that why you're like this?" she wondered aloud, slowly pacing around him in a wide circle to inspect him from every angle.

Amusedly he followed her with his eyes, watching her as she circled behind him and then turning to watch her come back around.

"I just might've," he said softly, running his hand over his neck again. "There's no way I'd forget the name of such a pretty girl otherwise."

Bella stopped abruptly. "Stop that."

"Stop what?"

She waved her hands at him. " _That."_

He grinned and bowed his head. "My apologies. Can't seem to help myself."

Her cheeks reddened by the second, her breath faltered. Throwing her hands up, she turned away from him and began walking. Where? She didn't know. She didn't care. Her mind was a mess and she couldn't think when that… he… ugh. Her mind was a mess, reeling and scattered. It was like trying to catch a paper bag in a harsh wind. Impossible.

Footsteps echoed behind her as Jasper followed.

"What's your name anyway?"

For a moment, as she stepped around a fallen tree, she considered ignoring him. But then she thought better of it. It wasn't _his_ fault that he was so handsome.

"Bella."

He was quiet for a moment. "And I know you?"

She hung back until he caught up to her, then began her walk anew. Fiddling with her fingers in front of her, she couldn't bring herself to look at him. "I guess… well, we're… friends?"

"Is that a question?"

"No?"

"Hm." He didn't sound convinced, but he didn't push it any further.

They were silent for a while, passing through the forest. With her mind such a mess, it was a wonder she could put one foot in front of the other. Bella knew, though, if she stopped walking… if she paused to think, that her mind would spiral into chaos.

Every so often, she caught Jasper watching her out of the corner of her eye. Whenever she would turn to look at him, he'd smirk.

She'd turn quickly away, cheeks burning. After several minutes of this, he spoke up.

"Do you live around here, Bella?"

She swallowed. "You could say that."

When she spoke no further, he went on. "Why were you in a tree?"

Turning an unimpressed look on him, she said, "Because someone _put_ me there."

With a raised brow, he turned to look behind him then back at her. "Me?" he pointed to himself, humored disbelief. "Sorry, darlin'. I'm not in the habit of puttin' girls in trees. Not really my way of doing things."

Bella grumbled.

"So that means we're traveling together?"

Her shoulders rose and fell sharply. He chuckled and slung an arm around her shoulders. "I was right. You are a quiet thing."

Bella squealed, though she'd never admit to such a noise. Jumping three feet away, she spun and faced him as he rose his hands up innocently.

"Easy, hellcat," he soothed. "I didn't mean anything by it."

"You- you are _not_ acting right," she accused. His touch had electrified her, sent a pressure straight to her gut.

"Easy," he soothed again, calm and concerned. Great. He thought _she_ was crazy.

He was silent for a moment, looking at her with a considering expression. "I'm sorry. That was inappropriate of me. I won't do it again. Alright? I'm sorry."

She nodded slowly. But she couldn't stand looking into those eyes anymore. They made her at once want to go to him for comfort and run as fast as she could the opposite way. Turning on her heel, she began her quick walk away. Where was the town from here?

Jasper followed behind her.

"Bella? Can I ask you a question?"

"Don't talk to me like that," she snipped.

"Sorry?"

"Like I'm gonna break. I can handle this," she said, more to herself than him. "I can."

"Alright," he drawled slowly. She could just _feel_ his concerned look burning into the back of her head. "Where are we?"

"Washington," she answered without much thought.

A snort followed her sentence. She rounded on him. "What?"

"You need to check your map again, darlin'. I was in Galveston just yesterday."

"Galveston? Like… in Texas?"

"Unless there's another Galveston I haven't heard of?" Sarcasm.

…She wasn't sure she liked this Jasper.

"Well," she made a broad sweep of her hands. "Does this look like a beach town to you? Have a lot of forests in Galveston, do you?"

Bella knew she was being harsh. She was lashing out. But she couldn't seem to help herself. She was scared and now that her one source of companionship had suddenly, _literally_ changed personalities, she felt more alone than ever.

Jasper considered the woods. Staring at the canopy he turned and walked a circle, lips pursed. "Where are we?" he asked again.

"I already told you. Washington."

"That's impossible," he snarled, immediately looking contrite when she flinched. "It's just… there's no way. It's impossible."

But the truth was written in the trees. The non-native trees which towered overhead. And the weather, bone-bitingly cold.

"Did… you bring me here?"

She snorted. "Hardly." Another pang of regret when a look of utter, desperate confusion crossed his features. He was just as alone as she was, in a foreign land that, in his own mind, he'd never been to.

He turned, walking towards a tree. But then…

Jasper… tripped. Over a log. A vampire. Had. Tripped.

He got quickly to his feet with a rough clearing of his throat. "You-… sorry, but there's no way. You must be mistaken."

"Are you alright?" she asked instead, still reeling.

"I was… I was in Galveston just yesterday. Just yesterday," he continued to repeat. "I saw the beach with my own eyes. _I was there."_

"Jasper…"

"Sorry," he held up a hand, eyes wild. "I think I need a second." He stumbled again, then dropped to sit with his back against a tree. Running a hand down his face, he shook his head. "They're gonna hang me… Think I'm traitor. This isn't happening."

Bella came closer, unsure of what to do. He was clearly living in a different time, his words made no sense to her. Who was going to hang him? This… this was who Jasper was before he'd been turned. …How badly was his mind fractured? And what kind of horrors were strong enough to do such a thing to a mind?

"What month is it?" he asked quickly.

Before she could answer, he went on. "They're facing 'em 'ithout me." With a growl, he dropped his head back against the tree.

Now, it was a perfectly normal, human gesture. And if he'd been a perfectly normal human, he would've thunked his head against the bark and that would've been that.

As it was, however…

The tree groaned and toppled over, creaking and smashing through the canopy, taking other trees along with it. One moment she was watching the chaotic cacophony, the next she was almost a mile away from it.

Dazedly, she felt an arm wrapped around her waist. Looking up into scarlet eyes, she assessed him.

"Jasper?"

Though he didn't smile, a warmth entered his features when his eyes met her own.

Things began to fall in place in her mind and she tested her theory. "Do you still want to know the month?"

His head tilted, locks of hair rippling with his movement. "The month?" he muttered.

Ok…

Jasper had two personalities. Ok. She could deal with that. Totally. Gone was the suave, flirtatious cowboy. In his place was the more familiar, silent and stoic vampire that she had rescued from chains and starvation. Had the shock of the falling tree brought forth the other? A protective mechanism?

Bella nodded slowly, a painful smile suddenly splitting her face. "That's great," she said enthusiastically. Distantly, she was aware she was going into shock. It was too much, all of it. Too much.

Before she could hesitate, she shuffled into his warm embrace in a silent plea for comfort. She needed his warmth. To take in his familiar scent. Pressing her nose against his chest, she nearly crooned when he automatically wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin on top of her head.

"Will you take me back to the truck? I don't know where we are. I don't…" She trailed off.

She felt him nod against her. In one movement her feet were taken out from under her and she was scooped into his arms. She hid her face against his neck.

The world blurred into hazy colors as unimaginable speed took both her breath and consciousness away from her.

* * *

Yeah. I'm not sure if Jasper's personality as a human is totally true to canon but I've utterly decimated Meyer's plot line so far, why not butcher her characters while I'm at it.

So, totally unrelated but I like to tell stories (obviously).

I live right next to Galveston. Go there all the time in the summer. I don't know if yall believe in ghosts but I sure do and that place is haunted as fuck. There's been so much bloodshed there I'm surprised the sand isn't red. I stayed at Hotel Galvez once and went on a tour and when they were talking about some children spirits that wander around, something _fucking tugged on my dress._ And St. Mary's Orphanage/haunted walmart(yeah, I know)- look it up if you're up for a good cry.


	11. Chapter 11

Over the course of the few days during their little vacation, Bella has come to realize a few things about her complicated companion.

She'd already been aware going into this that his mind wasn't quite… right. But with his little alteration of character yesterday, she is now more aware than ever the severity of the situation. Multiple personalities…

And who knows how many more are stuffed into that head of his, what with the way he volleys from one mood to the next in the course of a few minutes, quick enough to give her whiplash.

Another thing she's come to realize: he's a magnet for trouble. As if echoing her thoughts, the television hanging in the corner of the diner blares with alarming intensity. A professional anchorwoman with eyes blown wide repeats the same headline that has been going non-stop for the entirety of the day.

A dangerous animal, perhaps a rabid bear or mountain lion, responsible for the utter butchery of a library security guard.

Bella drops her eyes to her half-finished burger as the news program goes on to tell of the man's grieving family.

Yes, it's… complicated, if that's the right word. But she'd known that going in. And now she is responsible for the death of a man with a family of three.

Her throat tightens and she gives up on the idea of her meal. Leaning back into her booth, she gazes out of the window into the night beyond.

The origin of her woes is somewhere out there, prowling the woods for a meal. She prays there are no hikers out there.

It's not like she blames him. He is no more in control of his emotions than that of an abused animal that turns to bite any hand that comes near it.

She shakes her head- she's got to stop comparing him to a wounded animal. It's dehumanizing and he deserves better than that. No, he's a wounded man, with unimaginable atrocities committed against him, left with a shattered mind in return. It makes her heart flinch to even consider it.

She's at a loss though. How many more innocents would die at his hands? It's not like she can stop him, no more than a mouse could stop the closing jaws of a wolf. What can she do, besides stay by his side and help him recover?

With a trembling lip, she drops her head and takes a shaky breath. It's not enough. Not enough to stand by and hope that fate doesn't bring another poor and unsuspecting soul into the maws of death.

But there's nothing she can do.

Nothing.

* * *

Edward stands, crushing the remote in his grip and flinging it at the t.v. No one in the Cullen house bothers to flinch.

"It's him," Edward rages. Rounding on Alice, perched on the kitchen countertop, he stabs a finger in her direction. "I told you, I _told_ you this was a bad idea. But no one ever listens to me! And now that- that thing has Bella and has already gone on a murder spree. This is on _you,_ " he snarls, "on all of you."

The Cullen's shift but say nothing. Perhaps it is their fault? Should they have put him down when they had the chance?

Carlisle rubs his jaw. "I thought if we could get through to him…"

Esme lays a hand against his shoulder. "We all did."

Edward tosses a table through the floor-to-ceiling windows. As glass rains to the floor, he says, "He'll only get stronger every day. We go now, before he can actually do something against us."

Carlisle sighs as every head turns toward him. Though Edward talks the loudest, it is clear who is truly in charge of the coven. "I agree with Edward. Not only to protect Bella and the civilians but if word gets out to the Volturi… well, it's just best if we handle this ourselves."

The room thrums with nervous energy as jaws clench and eyes darken with resolve.

* * *

She's barely a mile from the diner, walking a desolate dirt road away from the town when a familiar shape flickers into existence at her side. He keeps her pace, gazing at her without any reserve, with no mind for the common rules of civility.

Despite herself, she smiles gently at him, ignoring the wrench in her gut at the sight of the blood drying on his chin and down the front of his throat. She prays it belongs to an animal.

The barest twitch at the corner of his mouth, his version of a smile, one given only to her.

This personality, one characterized by silence and near cautiousness, she's come to call the Feral- with lack of a better name. This side of Jasper is ruled purely by instinct, with the smallest bit of humanity reserved for her and her only. For anything else, a threat or otherwise, is met with pure and unadulterated, wild ferocity.

This is the personality that murdered the night guard, either out of protection for her, hunger, or a twisted version of both.

Despite herself, she can't bring herself to fear feral Jasper. She only fears for the safety of others.

Another mile down the dirt road, gravel crunching beneath their shoes as her companion glides enviably gracefully and silent beside her, and they come upon her beaten old truck, inside which she grabs a rag and a bottle of water.

Pausing in the cab, she runs a hand down her face and can't help but chuckle humorlessly at her situation.

Here she is, miles away from home with a man she'd not known for even a month- not to mention that he could kill her with a twitch of a finger- with a few hundred dollars in the bank to support her on this foolhardy adventure, after losing the closest thing to a family she'd ever had.

Unbidden, stinging tears creep out of the corner of her eyes and pool to drip down her chin. Hunching into herself, she goes and sits on top of one of the metal picnic tables bordering the overgrown trailhead of the forest where she'd decided very few would wander near.

Propping her head in her hands, she tries to breathe through the steadily rising panic. It hurts, this feeling of loneliness, of feeling out of control. She doesn't care how weak it makes her sound, she's scared. What if she did something wrong? Accidentally hurt Jasper's mind, or had another person killed on her watch? It was all too much, too much-

The silent slide of fabric against her arm brings her head jolting up. Jasper settles beside her, arm pressed against her own, head dipped forward to look into her tear-streaked face.

"Sorry," she mutters, voice water-logged. Wiping fruitlessly at her puffy eyes.

His voice piercing the darkness makes her jump. "You don't have to be afraid."

This is one of his more lucid moments, the saner part of the feral man coming forward from the dark shadows of his mind.

"I'm not," she lies, snorting at the slight raise of an unimpressed eyebrow. "I just… I don't know what to do. I don't know what I'm _doing._ I told you I'd help you and I thought I was, leaving Forks. But what if I'm wrong? What if I've hurt you even more? What if I've taken away your only chance at a better life, and now-" the new surge of helpless sadness closes her throat once more and she clutches at the air uselessly. "I'm sorry Jasper. I'm so so sorry," she croaks. She's not sure why she apologizes. For ruining his chance at getting better? For the fact that he has to get better in the first place after whatever had ruined him had its way with him?

He must think her raving, a delicate little human not in control of her life let alone her mind.

Swiping away her tears, clearing her blurry vision, she sees his face contorted into a silent debate with himself. Confusion and helplessness the most dominant of all.

Immediate shame wells within her. It isn't his fault- he shouldn't be burdened with her own mistakes.

Sniffling, she once more catches sight of the blood caking his face. Wetting the rag, she hesitantly shifts closer to him and gently, ever so gently begins wiping away the sanguine liquid.

Her own wave of calm descends around her as his eyelids droop and he leans into her touch drowsily. Rubbing his chin as if he were a cat brings a soft, barely audible thrum of approval from the base of his throat. The comfort from the sound produced is astounding.

"As much as I'd like it," he murmurs, pressing further into her hand when she pauses. "You aren't my savior, Bella." Her breath catches at the sound of her name on his lips. "No one is. This is my burden, and my burden only."

She marvels at the sound of his voice, so rarely used.

"But you're here beside me," he continues. "And that's all I could ask for. I don't care what we do or where we go." He breathes, steadying himself, most likely as overwhelmed as she is by his sudden talkativeness. "If you need to, we'll return to Forks. This isn't your burden. I'm not your burden. You've done enough already."

Lip trembling, she sets aside the bloody cloth to instead run her fingers over his now clean jaw. He drops his head, purring once more as her fingers run through his hair. Leaning forward, he drops his head against her shoulder, a warm weight that makes her fears instantly vanish. "I don't know why you call to me so much…" he swallows again. "But I can leave right this second if you ask it of me."

Bella's hands stop but he runs his cheek along her shoulder blade until she resumes her ministrations.

Before she can reply, he speaks so softly she can hardly hear him.

"I can't even remember the last time someone touched me without violence. No, Bella. You've done enough already, just being here."

That last sentence is enough to send her tipping over that precarious ledge she'd been balancing upon. Tears freshly flowing, she turns her face into his soft hair and sobs silently.

Arms wrap around her waist, dragging her closer, and he once more descends into his characteristic silence as she heaves with emotion beside him. She shamelessly ugly-cries, relief beyond words flooding her heart at his acknowledgment that she has helped, she'd done _something_ right. Her fondness for him grows, makes her heart swell.

She doesn't care how emotional she's being. It's been hard, leaving behind all that's she has ever known for a near stranger, constantly thinking she wasn't enough, in way over her head… only for him to say the exact thing she needed. No, she won't apologize for her tears.

They sit like that for an unknown amount of time, punctuated only by the rising of the moon and the stirring buzz of crickets perched within the forest.

She eventually tires herself out until she can cry no more. Exhaustion makes her bones leaden, her head heavy as it drops against his own, pressed cheek to cheek with his scent calming her even further.

This is nice. Peaceful. It's enough to make her decision worth it. And his warmth… gods. Weren't vampires supposed to be cold? Why is he so different?

It's just as she is dropping into sleep that Jasper brings her gasping awake, jerked awake so quickly that her head spins.

A terrible sound escapes his chest as he tenses around her, arms crushing her to his chest as he curls his body around hers. Face contorted into a monster-like grimace of absolute fury, the quiet man that had held and comforted her is long gone, replaced with his more feral counterpart.

Following his gaze, she looks out into the dark forest, having to wait long moments until she actually sees a silhouette of a man amidst the shadows.

The stranger's voice rings out. "Well, I'll be damned. Jasper Whitlock, back from the dead."

She tenses, Jasper roars, and the stranger grins.

"Been a while, Jazz. Why don't you come 'n give your brother a big ol' hug?"

Before she can breathe, she is alone, barely catching herself before she falls.

In the distance, trees crash and the terrible sounds of furious fighting rings out, the sounds of demons from the worst of nightmares come to life.

* * *

AN: Hey… please don't hurt me. I won't make any excuses, only apologize for my absence.

In other news, I'm thinking of starting an Overwatch fic starring my favorite edgelord Reaper. Would anyone be interested? Don't worry, I'll continue this fic as well. Please let me know in the reviews or via PM.

Have a wonderful week my friends!

-Iva


	12. Chapter 12

The sounds were monstrous, like lions and mountain lions screeching. Trees toppled in the dark as behemoths battled.

And she could hardly see any of it.

Another screech, a laugh, and then arms were scooping her up and she was flying.

Before she could gain her bearings, the arms disappeared and she was left at the opposite edge of the clearing, far from the brutal fight.

It was a whirl, her mind hardly able to catch up. Another millisecond and a man suddenly appeared before her. He had a charming grin and his delicate features screamed vampire.

"Miss," he said, tipping an invisible hat.

Before she could blink- this was truly becoming too much- Jasper blurred past, barreling into the man with him, and they vanished into the darkness once more.

Bella was shaking, and screamed when another figure appeared in front of her.

"Hello my dear," the woman said- another vampire. She was beautiful, ethereal in her movements and gentle expression. The woman lifted a lock of Bella's hair and pushed it behind her ear in a motherly gesture. "I'm sorry to be so forward, but I'm going to have to take you somewhere for the time being." The woman dragged Bella into her arms, immune to her viscious struggles. "Hush now. My name's Charlotte- you'll be safe with me."

"Jasper!" Bella shouted, wriggling and squirming. She was terrified.

"Shh. It's alright-"

Charlotte didn't get to finish her statement. Her head was wrenched back by the hair, further and further until her neck tore and her head snapped from her spine.

The vampire's limp body fell, Bella along with her. But before she could fall beneath the boulder that was her body, the familiar scent of mesquite and rainwater overtook her and she was once more in Jasper's arms.

He was virtually trembling, snarling with each breath he drew. He set her on her feet and pushed her behind him. He backed into her, crowding her backwards step by step. She had to hold onto his shoulders for leverage in order to watch the others.

The man landed behind the woman, Charlotte's, prone body.

"You've gotten stronger, buddy," the man said. Gone was his earlier charm and grace. Now it was tainted with caution and disguised frustration as he spared a glance to Charlotte.

Jasper didn't reply and Bella was having enough trouble as it was keeping her anxiety down.

"Listen m'am," the man said, directing his attention to her. "This man's name is Jasper Whitlock- he's… well it's hard to explain but he's unlike a normal human, he-"

"I know what you are," Bella said breathlessly. "And I know who he is."

The man was lost for words, then continued after a beat.

Jasper was growing more agitated by the second and she knew any vestige of humanity was long gone. This Jasper was as feral as feral could be.

"Well then you know what he's capable of," he said. "Don't worry, we'll help you. Until then, don't panic. Just try to act submissive. Just do whatever you've been doing to avoid being drained for this long."

"He won't hurt me," she said, insulted, amazed at the very thought. Of course, looking at him now would definitely lead someone to that confusion. But still. She clutched Jasper's shoulders tighter and Jasper snarled in response to her distress.

"I'll be fine," she said. "Truly. Now please go. I don't want him to hurt you…" She looked at the woman's body with remorse. "...anymore than he already has. I'm sorry, for everything."

She backed up step for step as Jasper crowded into her once more.

"I'll be fine," she said again. "Thank you."

With that, Jasper turned on his heel, gathered her into his arms, and with unimaginable speed they disappeared.

* * *

It took her hours to calm him down. It was a matter of running her fingers through his hair, pressing close to him, and speaking soothingly.

He was a soldier- she'd surmised that herself. But with the added instincts added from a vampire, he became something greater. A type of paranoid, vicious, and powerful soldier.

She'd heard of PTSD. Had seen it in pictures and documentaries. The same thing that connected each victim, she'd noticed, was their eyes.

Their gaze would be thousands of miles away, even if they were looking right at you. They were seeing something far, far away from somewhere unknown.

When he was in this mode of speechless rage, he gained that same gaze.

She'd understood the couple that had ambushed Jasper had meant well. They'd had kind eyes and a genuine demeanor. They'd wanted to help, and perhaps might appear once more. It was obvious the male recognized Jasper, but how she did not know.

But their intervention had only set what little progress Jasper had made back to right before Bella and he had met.

But Bella was a patient woman. And she'd be there for him as long as was necessary, guiding him until he could function once more.

But what if, when he became more lucid, he'd realize how erroneous it was to keep a human around? He'd disappear into the night and leave her to once more retreat into solitude. It wasn't as if she could go to the Cullens, afterall.

But she'd had a taste of the world that normal people were unaware of, and to think that it would be lost to her scared her. It was a bright, if terrifying world- it was something bigger than herself. She didn't want to lose it- it pained her to think as much. Almost as much as the thought of Jasper abandoning her.

She knew it was selfish. She knew it was foolish.

But she was only human, afterall.

* * *

AN: I'm sorry for the long wait. I'm very rusty with my writing, so please tell me if you are dissatisfied with this chapter, I'll do my best to fix it.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the continued support and I ask that you can forgive me for my disappearance.

Thank you again.

Until next time, pumpkins :)

-Iva


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